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contact with absent father 3 hours away

2 replies

lolopops2 · 04/03/2016 17:24

Hi
REALLY need some advice. My 6 year old lives with me and his father lives 3 hours away. We've been divorced for almost 1 year now. Magistrates said dad has to see our son every other weekend and we share holidays. Every two weeks we have to meet halfway for a handover which for me, is up to a 2 hour drive away at a service station on the motorway and it only takes dad about 50mins although it is geographically a halfway point. My son is really upset about getting in the car and driving all that way. It really stresses him out despite iPad and sleeping etc. Dad says our son has to do it. Dad won't move down to where we are. He is happy and working where he is. I just don't know what to do. A part of me is thinking to jack my life in down here and just go and move to where dad lives so my son can be closer to him. My son really misses him. Dad has never ever got to get him dressed for school, he misses school activities because he lives so far away. If I moved to where dad lives, SO much would need to change: new school, I'd need to get a carer in to look after my mum near me who has Parkinsons and Dementia, I'd need to rent my house out, I'd have to make new friends and get a new job where Dad lives. I would do it for my son, as he'd love to be nearer dad but I just don't know what to do. Feel so confused and can't bear for my son to be so upset at the thought of not wanting to get in the car. Any advice??

OP posts:
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starry0ne · 04/03/2016 22:01

How long has he been doing this drive?

Is there anything stopping Ex moving back..Ie been a carer?

I don't see you should have to do this..I would try the no nonsense approach with your DS...I found with my DS at that age the more fuss I made the more he got him upset about nothing..

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NorfolkEnchantsToday · 05/03/2016 10:39

My experience is similar.

I have to drop DD the three hours off, so six hour round trip and he does the six hours home

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