The father of my DD has never been in contact.
I brought her up alone and never chased him for maintenance. A few years ago I decided it was about time he started contributing so I applied to the then-CSA. They tracked him down, did the calculations and sent a payment schedule.
Then he went off radar and we never received any maintenance at all. He just completely disappeared and the CSA couldn't find him.
We've been transferred to the CMS now and they can't find him either.
Periodically, we search and search online for him but nothing ever comes up. Absolutely nothing at all. It's like he doesn't exist.
However.
During our most recent search, something DID come up. It would seem he has slipped up in his extraordinary efforts to stay hidden online.
I now have an address in a place I wouldn't have expected at all, but with a bit of further digging I can see connections to this place.
The sensible side of me is saying NOT to report this to the CMS just yet for a couple of reasons:
1. I'm not 100% certain it's him. Only 99% certain.
2. As soon as I tell the CMS, they will write to him at that address, and IF it's him then as soon as he gets their letter, he will disappear again.
I can't go to this place to see if it's really him. If I turned up, he would do a runner and then he'd disappear again.
I can't send someone else to see if it's really him. I'm the only one who knows what he looks like.
I have contacted a private investigator in that area for a quote, but can't afford it. I could put it on my credit card, but if it's not him then that money will have been wasted.
What do I do??
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Your thoughts on this absent father situation please
22 replies
QueenCarpetJewels · 15/02/2016 00:55
OP posts:
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