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I'm having one of those miserable days that remove the joy of being on my own

(3 Posts)
TheTigerIsOut Wed 06-Jan-16 18:27:08

I have spent most of the day in A&E in pain with a suspected heart attack. I have been through a cardiography, radiography, and a number of other tests.

Came 3 o'clock and the consultant comes to tell me they have lost my blood samples, which they were waiting for more than an hour. I have very small veins so I was already feeling very bruised from the first samples before they had to try to get blood again from both arms and my hands.

DS had a doctor's appointment at 4:15, which obviously I couldn't make after the first samples were lost. I rang the gp to re arrange an hour in advance and they tell me they don't have another appointment available for him until next week (Fantastic, I was sent to a&E by 999 because appointments on the day can only be booked if I ring very early in the morning and I didn't start feeling that bad until 10). I tell the GP receptionist that DS condition will be much worse by next week but she insists that she cannot give me an earlier appointment unless I call before 10. So I say I will keep the appointment I was cancelling and would do my best to get there in time. Magically, a later appointment today immediate materialises.

But the bloods tests had not arrived by 4:30, I explain to the the registrar, who obviously doesn't want to let me go without knowing about the results, that I am on my own, that I have no family in the country and that my son should have arrived home by then, and all the situation with the GP.

She agrees to talk to the consultant and they agree to let me know the results of the last tests by phone. So I head home, pick up DS and head to the GP.

They have called me now, and I'm ok, but I admit to have cried in the hospital, not because I was scared that it could be a heart attack but about facing the sad reality, again, that if something happens to me, there is nobody to pick up the pieces and take care of DS.

I do not regret for a second leaving my exH, I'm sure that if this had happened when I was with him he would probably be away in a conference, in a "so important meeting" or so focused in having fun to pick up his damn phone. What I resent is having a contact order that prevents me from moving DS back to my country to protect the contact with a father who has refused to see him for the last 6 years.

End of rant.

VenusRising Wed 06-Jan-16 18:44:28

Tiger, I don't know very much about your situation wrt your XH, or what country you are in, or whether you're British, but I'm so sorry that things seem so tough for you right now.

I also think that if you were to contact your embassy and try and negotiate a move back to your home country that might make things easier for you.
Make sure you have evidence of trying to get your XH to see your DS and his lack of relationship with him over the six years.

Maybe I'm being totally wrong here, but surely your XH could not see his DS just as well if you were back in your home country with friends and family around you?

I hope you find a resolution, and have better health and luck in '16.

TheTigerIsOut Wed 06-Jan-16 18:56:05

One of my friends was involved in removal of jurisdiction process, it took 3 years, costed her over £80,000, was very traumatic both for her and her Ds as the ex was a proper psychopath, and... Failed. 10 years down the line, there is no contact with the dad anymore as he beat the child bad enough to send him to hospital. Yet, the order stands and my friend is rightly terrified about doin anything that may bring the nightmare back.

I'mnot quite sure I would survive something like that...

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