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Does anyone have any experience of contact where NRP has long term substantial mental health issues?

(7 Posts)
ontheedgeofnewdawn Thu 17-Dec-15 17:28:42

Asking for a friend who has no internet. She has two children both young teens. One remembers what things were like when at home and doesn't want to see him at all. Dad has chose not to see them in five years as says it hurts too much. Now trying to get involved again.

Anyone any experience? Do they have supervised. Will the fact the child is older mean they might get unsupervised?

LittlestLightOnTheTree Thu 17-Dec-15 17:50:31

Depends what the issues are

Mine were teens and not allowed contact til age 16

starry0ne Thu 17-Dec-15 17:57:16

As the are young teens court is likely to listen to their opinion...

My Ex had MH issues ( much younger child though) Cafcass did report stating no contact till psych report.. however he pulled out before it got to court.

Again depends what MH issues are...

ontheedgeofnewdawn Thu 17-Dec-15 18:27:57

Very severe depression, history of suicide attempts, been an inpatient following suicide attempt and severe thoughts about what they might do.

cestlavielife Fri 18-Dec-15 17:56:41

child can request only supervised.

child could state who should supervise eg family friend

if no suitable other adult, as long time, parent could request that dc and dad attend /use trained family therapist.

i have one dd who wants to see ex (severe depressive episodes amongst other things) - we did family therapy sessions which were useful. ex currently stable.
older dd now 15 does not see him her choice . she didnt go and spend time with him since she was 12-13. he used to try and see her by coming into house when dropping off other dd bu each time he made a hash of it.

let DCs have their say about what they think preferably with trained family therapist.

ontheedgeofnewdawn Fri 18-Dec-15 18:22:27

Thank you very helpful. Did the child at 12/13 have to go to court or cafcass to be allowed not to go?

cestlavielife Fri 18-Dec-15 22:00:38

No ...ex didn't believe in court so didn't take it there. That helped... Dds were going to family therapy older dd only went couple times aNd reiterated she didn't want to see him ... last year we had ss involved as ex barged in and over stepped the mark and it was made clear she could make her own decision. They will need to go to mediation but her dc should also get chance to give their views. If they curious about seeing him but want another adult there that should be respected. Given their age make sure they get chance to talk it thru and decide how or if to see him. You could use contact centre but better some kind of trained facilitator .

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