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Need advice re getting ex to see more of dd

(3 Posts)
isaterror Sun 29-Nov-15 20:02:16

Hello all

It says it all in the title really. We split up in Jan this year and he has our dd with him one weekend every 2 weeks (fri & sat night ) I am desperately trying to hold everything together and keep a job going but struggling with it all as I have no family and a small support network that all have their own lives.

Can anyone suggest how I might be able to get my ex to increase the time she has with him? Ideally I'd like him to stick to the every 2 week arrangement but add in him having her to stay every Friday night, take her to a weekly activity every sat morning and then bring her home in the early afternoon, but so far he won't listen and just says he's too busy.

I work in a country house and Friday nights are the busiest time of the week, plus he works late mon - thu so says he can't have her then...

Result of all this is I'm in the verge of a nervous breakdown while he swoops in every 2 weeks pretending to be dad of the year and then falls off the face of the earth again.

I know that he is selfish which is one of the reasons I left him, and that he thinks he is winning by not agreeing to take more responsibility but I know that it is his own relationship with his daughter that will ultimately be the only relationship that suffers which is very sad.... But still surely responsibility should be equal... It's not fair that the chance of increasing my work prospects be non existent while he swans around. Anyway any help, advice, suggestions or just shared experiences would help. Iso it always going to be this hard?? xx

cestlavielife Sun 29-Nov-15 22:46:41

You can't make him.
You could ask.
But the activity would be his choice or not. How old is she ?
You will just have to arrange paid childcare.

RunRabbitRunRabbit Sun 29-Nov-15 22:54:32

If he is selfish he will be selfish about this.

Assume you will get no fairness from him, he might even drop the EOW. Organise your own childcare and routine.

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