Please let me know what you think?
My son is 14, and see's his dad 2 or 3 nights a week. However on the days my ex husbands has his son he repeatedly drops him off at my house - without asking for the whole day - picking him up sometimes after 9pm (this has become quite prevalent during the holidays) . Often I'm not home ( partly because I work away when I don't have my son - arranging my diary purposely in this way- and partly because I stay with my new partner when I can). This weekend my son and his friend has two days of the house to themselves!
Despite my request to ex husband to have the courtesy to ask if I'm home before he drops my son off I cant seem to get him to take his responsibilities seriously. He says at 14 our son is old enough to arrange his own social life, and as he checked with our son, he thought it would be OK, and how can he possibly be held responsible.
I have pressed the matter of safety and welfare but to no avail. I have stressed that I am happy for our son to stay here as much as possible and to help him out whenever I can but to just drop him off without checking that I'm around, on his allocated days is not acceptable.
It is difficult because I never want to make my son feel he is not welcome in his own home, but I also feel at 14 - soon to be 15 - he needs parenting that gives him boundaries, rather than a free to do as you like parenting style.
Although this is not about finance - my ex husband also claims tax credits ( he works part time) and family allowance - so effectively he is paid for something he isn't doing.
Suggestions on how I can handle this would be most welcome.
Thanks
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Irresponsible parenting from ex husband - am I being unreasonable?
8 replies
MrsL10 · 07/09/2015 20:35
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