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He really is such an arse.

(4 Posts)
SophieHatters Tue 23-Jun-15 07:37:21

I need to vent about ex. He is currently seeing ds only two or three times a year due to forgetting to turn up for his once a month visits, and ds having had enough of it. So he only sees him when he takes him to see his own mother.

Last time he said he would come over on ds's birthday, but said the wrong date in front of ds which I had to correct and he hastily tried to pretend that was what he had said. hmm

Then he turned up, a few days in advance, bringing the 'present and card' he had promised (which doesn't always happen so I was surprised)

the 'present' was not wrapped; it was a tool box, ostensibly for ds to use when helping ex fix his sports car.

You would think, oh nice - ds does like his tools - but one, it was from the only non-supermarket and accessible-by-car shop which he probably went in on the way over, two, the padlock he bought with it didn't fit, and three, a couple of days later ds said he hadn't been able to close it properly, and looking for the first time I realised the whole end was buckled like it had been run over. I straightened it out as best I could but seriously, a broken tool box for a gift?

Fourthly the fixing of said car was proposed last year and ds hasn't been near it, and I doubt he ever will go near it, just like all the other things ex has ever promised to ds.

The card, which he had instructed us was to be 'opened on the day', was actually torn. I mean a big several-inch tear in it.

I wrote it off as typical shit behaviour from ex, who pretends to be so loving.

Then on Sunday, we noticed he had called ds early in the morning so ds rang him back from the car.

Apparently he had called him by accident and told ds this. Not 'I missed you and wondered how you were doing' sad

The guy is such a shit. I hardly know whether to just cut contact completely or let ds suffer this long slow realisation of just how little his father cares about him.

Starlightbright1 Tue 23-Jun-15 21:50:23

Can I ask how old DS is? How does he feel...If old enough I would support what he wants

SophieHatters Wed 24-Jun-15 07:15:53

Thanks Starlight. He is just 12. He doesn't really know what he wants, well, he says that but honestly it is very hard to tell. He didn't know his dad till he was 7 anyway.

Starlightbright1 Wed 24-Jun-15 07:50:49

I would just leave him with it then..I would let him know that you will support any decision he makes and always there if he wants to talk about it.

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