Recently became single parent to 2 year old and 4 month old...

[Keepontrudging]

... Tell me I can do this! Would love to hear your positive experiences / advice !

[Whatwillbewillbe43]

you can do this !!!!
It's not easy at times but you can pull all your powers you need to and get through the difficult times for your children... I left my ex partner when my daughter was3 she's now 7... I try to keep things as amicable as I can between us for the sake of my daughter as she is the most important person in it all...
I left a well off man and started on my own with no help from him and over the years I have built myself back up into a really happy place, good luck you will be fine think positive and focus everything on your children xxx

[BlackeyedSusan]

mine were 2 and 4 when we split up. turns out the 2 year old also has autism. hmm that was fun.

ermm... wellwe are all still alive... and keeping on keeping on.

[Keepontrudging]

Thanks guys. Oh Susan that must have been so difficult. Glad you're all still alive- haha! I keep feeling determined and strong (generally a very strong person) but will have wee moments of sheer panic about the situation that engulf me -almost physically. My partner walked out this weekend on us. I think he would come back, but it would never work and I have no respect anymore. I feel so sad for my babies.

[Twistedheartache]

You can do it - I've got a just turned 4 year old & a 6 month old who has been diagnosed with a hearing impairment. Ex left 2 months ago but realistically hadn't done much since baby born.
It's still early days & It's horrible & hard but we've just had a brilliant weekend which makes me think we'll be just fine.
(not sure how I'm gonna manage a ft job as well come Oct but it'll fit somehow!)

[twirlypoo]

You can do this!!!

I've been a lone parent since pregnancy. It's hard, but it's also freeing and MUCH better than living with a knobatron who doesn't contribute. You will find ways and routines that get you through it, and the panic will subside as your new life becomes more settled.

You sound strong and capable, you will be just fine, promise

[Keepontrudging]

Thanks twirly! Knobatron- lol. How apt.

[BetterWoman]

You can do this!! You definitely can, and you'll be all the better for it. Take it from a single mother who knows :) Don't let knobatron back in your life, there are better things waiting for you.

[DressingGown]

Agree. You can definitely do this. And being a single parent is much easier, psychologically at least, than the stress of living with someone who makes you unhappy. Don't be sad for your babies. Be happy that they've got a strong mother providing them with a great example to follow.

[Atenco]

Go for it, OP. In Mexico we say it is better to be alone than in bad company. I was a single mother from the start and in a lot of ways it is easier than having your average partner. Prince Charming of course would have been another thing. You can come and go as you please without having to coordinate with someone else, you can eat when you and your child get hungry, etc.

My dd's father was such an eejit, anytime I felt that could use someone else to share the problems with, I would imagine him and how he was would say it was all my fault or something equally useless and be glad to be alone, even with problems at times.

[chocoraisin]

Ahh OP I feel for you. I read your post and though, this was me, 3 years ago. FWIW, me and my DC, we're now in a beautiful house, I run my own business, I have a loving DP and two SDC. Life is chuffing amazing. We made it through homelessness, pregnancy and birth and losing my job/friends as well as XH leaving. My knobber XH is now remarried and has another DC with his OW. I survived all of that, along with all the work of having two babies. Even when I write it out, three years on, I can look at it and say, hey it wasn't so bad. There was a lot of fun and laughter and learning in there too.

These days we aren't just surviving, we're thriving :) Have no fear. You won't have the nuclear family life you expected, but you should still expect a good, happy and fulfilling life. For you and your DC! Because when you expect that, you won't accept anything less than that. And that's the key. Keep your chin up and your head high. The best is yet to come x