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Drop off point for children

(4 Posts)
Gemmalily Tue 05-May-15 13:15:45

Does anyone know the legal position - my DC see their Dad 3 times a week and I agreed to do some of the travelling (only 3 miles) on the proviso that I meet at a local pub, I refused to go to his house as he is with an ex best friend (who he had an affair with and then left to live with her). I have been ultra reasonable throughout in order for the children not to be drawn in and gradually have come through the pain and out the other side. However, I will not go to their house as I don't wish to have anything to do with the exfriend. for 18 months this arrangement has been working fine, and now he has decided that he won't meet at the pub, that I have to go to their house. I refuse and yesterday the exfriend came to the pub too and gave me a mouthful saying I have to come to the house to pick them up. I drove off without responding as the children were there. I still refuse to go, I feel that I have been reasonable enough, the pub is within walking distance but gives me a degree of separation from their lives. I have moved on and am happy but do not want to get drawn into their lives by picking the children up from the house. Weekdays are fine as they get picked up/dropped off from school/my house.
I do not want to children to get involved so will not threaten to stop access, so what do I do? He refused previously to look at any solicitor letter (so I wasted �170 previously on this).
Any ideas about my legal position gratefully received!

OP’s posts: |
HeadDoctor Tue 05-May-15 15:30:30

I'd report the verbal abuse and stick to your plans.

Sanityseeker75 Tue 05-May-15 16:35:00

My Dh's ex used to kick off when he dropped kids off so they had it written into the court papers that drop off and pick up was at an agreed other place.

If it was working fine before I would just advise that you will be there at agreed meeting place at x time and that if he is not there then just go back home again.

If his new partner is abusive again then yes I would report it and use this to reinforce that it is the risk of the children witnessing violent and abusive behavior that is the reason why you have a neutral meeting place.

Gemmalily Tue 05-May-15 23:15:54

Thanks both, your comment Sanityseeker is a good one, the very reason I want to keep the drop off neutral is to protect the DC from potential agro. Today they came back from their Dads both upset and in tears to see me as they'd been worried about me, having seen what looked like an argument to them. Reinforces the point really. I will stick to my plans.

OP’s posts: |

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