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No contact from ex-husband. DS birthday is tomorrow.

(5 Posts)
ThanksforNothing Sat 07-Feb-15 17:34:46

Testing name change.

ThanksforNothing Sat 07-Feb-15 17:38:10

As title says really. I have name changed for this. My beautiful, lovely DS, will be 12 tomorrow and so far nothing from his dad. Not a card, present, email, text. No acknowledgment. Last year was no different. He was away with work but didn't bother even phoning and when he got back didn't even get him a card. Six weeks later, he took him "window shopping" to choose a present which never materialised. This is the second year running that DS hasn't had a Christmas present.

My son is so lovely and doesn't deserve this, just an acknowledgment would be something hmm

brittanyfairies Sat 07-Feb-15 18:00:59

My XH is exactly the same with my DCs, on Christmas Day couldn't speak to them would only text. Never asked them what they'd got for Christmas just a whole list of the things he'd been given.

No phone calls on birthdays either - although they did get a card and a present. Christmas present was 40 euros each - so a lot of thought here. They're only 12 and 10 too.

My oldest DC has now declared he doesn't really want to see dad again - but even when XH phones he never asks to speak to DS1 or even asks how he is (he only Skypes about once a month).

Their loss I think, they're missing out on wonderful children. I have to say that after three years my DCs just seem to regard their dad as someone who rocks up now and again and as somebody who makes fantastic promises to them but they never fail to materialise.

I wish your son a very happy birthday for tomorrow. I expect by now he won't even notice his dad hasn't bothered he'll just be happy to be with you and the fuss you make of him.

It's us as the mum's who feel the saddest I think.

ThanksforNothing Sat 07-Feb-15 18:04:09

I know exactly what his excuse will be, "I wanted to wait until I see him". Well seeing as he see's him at most 4 times a year, I won't be holding my breath. DS is so wonderful. We had a great afternoon today, a pre-birthday pub lunch just the two of us. It was great, I hope these are the sorts of things he remembers.

Pinkballoon Sat 07-Feb-15 21:25:23

Happy birthday to your son. He has a mum that cares.

Is there a relevance to the two years of him not receiving anything? Is he seeing someone else, or is this just the period of time that you've been split up?

My youngest didn't get a Christmas card or present, followed by no birthday present (2nd year running). He was offered supervised access for both occasions and turned it down. And I got the "I'll give her the presents when I see her" line. If he'd actually wanted her to have any presents, he'd have posted them. Thankfully she's too young to know who he is.

I've resolved to be as hard as nails with him now. Unforgiveable behaviour.

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