DS1 is 2 and DS2 is 8MO.
My Ex walked out on us a year and a half ago when I was 5 weeks pregnant with DS2 (planned) and it was such a shock.
Since then everything has seemed to go downhill, I'll keep It brief.
I moved back in with my parents only for my DF to become abusive and I had to move into a Hostel, this is away from my family and I have no friends as they lost interest as soon as I announced my pregnancy.
I suffered terribly with PND and anxiety after DS1 and I have been through CBT and counselling which has helped but I had to relive my past (I have been raped twice) which meant that I had to go onto anti depressants, I stopped using these a while ago now. I had no support whilst I was going through this as my family just kept saying that I just need to 'give myself a shake'.
So, I'm in a Hostel with my 2 DS's, I have no friends or family and I am still completely in love with my Ex.
I go out to the park or to kick a football around with DS1 in the sun and see families sitting there having picnics and couples with there children walking along together and I feel a deep sadness.
Anywhere I go I'm on my own and it hurts so much because I just want us to be a family again.
I'm alone in the evenings (when my DS's are in bed) and plan my life around watching TV just to make it go faster because I have no one to talk to.
I've been asking my Ex to be with us again every week since he walked out but the answer is always no and this devastates me as I would do anything to be a family again.
I love my children. They are my world and I wouldn't change anything about either of them because they are the ones that keeps me a float but I can't help but feel empty when I know that I am alone.
Sorry for the essay, I felt the need to let out how I feel.
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.
Lone parents
So unbelievably lonely.
7 replies
27onesies · 18/04/2014 08:15
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.