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Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

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Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

Lone parents

Right! Where do we find nice single men?!?!

192 replies

SnoopyLovesYou · 28/07/2013 16:03

Ok everybody! Where do us single parents meet attractive, nice, single men?

The local gym/ swimming pool?

Online dating?

Clubs & pubs?

Sports clubs?

Evening classes?

I know I've previously said Im happy being single and I am but I'm also young and red blooded and in need of male attention atm!

If we put our heads together, we might be able to find one or two between us?

;-)

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bluebeardsbabe · 28/07/2013 17:34

After reading a few threads on here I did try plenty of fish but I fear I won't be on there for long. I actually hate online dating. I just thought I might feel better if a few men contacted me to say I looked nice :) FYI...I don't!

I know a few people who have met people at the gym and I have myself been a member of one (can't afford it at the mo) and I would say there is quite a lot of flirting to be done there.

What about through mutual friends? Or reuniting with people through social media, ie people who you went to school with etc. Just a thought.

I am so ready to date though, or at least have a man look at me and say 'well you seem nice'. I am hoping this is possible with a 9 month old baby in tow!!!

BusyHomemaker · 28/07/2013 20:34

If you find any please point them my way! ;)

SnoopyLovesYou · 28/07/2013 21:21

Really??

I didn't know the gym was a pick up joint!!!!!!

Do people actually meet there????? Wow!!!! Like swapping numbers and all?

As for mutual friends, yes that might happen by itself but I feel I need to do some pro-active things too.

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bluebeardsbabe · 28/07/2013 21:23

I have a friend who met her husband at a gym...ok so they are now in the middle of an acrimonious divorce but still!!!

I also have a friend who now has 3 kids with a man she met at the gym, and so far they are still together :)

Just look for needle tracks in arms to sieve out the ones who are on steroids and you will be fine.

Might have to join up again, sigh.

ImNotBloody14 · 28/07/2013 21:27

Definitely NOT plenty of fish!

SnoopyLovesYou · 28/07/2013 21:32

Aha! The gym is where they're all hiding. I HATE the gym! What about swimming pool/sauna?

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SnoopyLovesYou · 28/07/2013 21:35

I thought I should specify that I am not interested in one night stands, online sex meet ups or any other weird sleazy stuff. I want to meet someone who's like a human. Someone I can have a connection with. (I'm sure we all actually want this just thought I'd point out that I'm not interested in just sex.)

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ImNotBloody14 · 28/07/2013 21:39

Someone that's like a human?

Honestly i would prefer someone that's like a dog, loyal, cuddly, quiet, lends a listening ear and keeps the bed warm of course that would all be great if it came im human form.

SnoopyLovesYou · 28/07/2013 21:40

Anybody know anywhere else to meet people? What about when with kids? Park, beach? On holiday? I really sound desperate! I'm not. Just still young and in need of a bit more fun in my life!

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MoreThanWords · 28/07/2013 21:41

I met a not so fucking single after all dad at the swimming pool - our kids were both having lessons.

Have met alcoholics, married/attached men, depressives, drunk drivers, a guy who put my hand on his erection an hour into the date walking round the park, and a guy who was on the sex offenders register, on Plenty of Fish.

Have swapped numbers with a guy from a petrol station - our eyes met across the unleaded...... - nope, depressive alcoholic.

Daughter's friend's dad, divorced, utterly reliable, dependable, faithful, perfect on paper, etc, etc, CRAP CRAP CRAP kisser.

I am currently debating whether to join Match - I've registered without a photo, and the barest of details, and they've sent me a 30% off code, but I'm not sure I can be bothered. I hate first dates! There's not really much hope, is there, lol.

SnoopyLovesYou · 28/07/2013 21:43

14 you're so funny!!!! I'm at a point where I really DON'T want a dog. I really shouldn't be looking to men for affirmation. I know I shouldn't. Not a good idea. I'd like someone independent. You're right. It's a cat I need ;-)

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SnoopyLovesYou · 28/07/2013 21:48

Well more than words if he's a crap kisser we all know what that means!

Sigh. Yes POF really is full of total weirdos isn't it? Surely there must be some nice honest people on it no?

Yeah I've considered Match too but then are we sure that they're not just as weird and desperate too? I don't think I can bear to pay for it!

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ImNotBloody14 · 28/07/2013 21:49

No cats leave you- bastards!

SnoopyLovesYou · 28/07/2013 21:57

Are we talking about cats here or independent male humans? ;-)

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ImNotBloody14 · 28/07/2013 22:04

They all leave me

MoreThanWords · 28/07/2013 22:05

I've been talking through my appalling dating history with my counsellor; he has pointed out I've had no decent male role models in my life, so that's why I'm struggling to 'be' in a decent relationship. I thought he would be telling me to stay single until I love myself etc, but actually he's quite excited about me going out dating as the new "counselled" me! I might leave it a bit longer yet

No-one at work worth shaving my legs for either except the under 30 year old and I am old enough to be his bloody mother

SnoopyLovesYou · 28/07/2013 22:19

That is fascinating! I have had no decent male role models either! Probably that's what's wrong with me too! What has he done with you to make you ready Id love to know! Is your counsellor kind of like a new role model or something?

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buthow · 29/07/2013 08:16

MoreThanWords me too got some one forcing ma head to go dwn to his horny penis in like an hour of meeting...gees was disgusted he listened to all soapy stories I told him abt ma life in the 1st minutes of meeting..ohw we seemed to hv a lot in common decent n handsome guy n I'm like "Lord thanku I thnk finally I'm there" only to later see my head forced dwn to e dick an hour later in the car n I'm like "waaaaaat" Geees...

Anyway it was too good to be true men dnt easily fall for 16 weeks preg women do they? So I also would like to know were the cool dudes who want something real are found so tht wen I pop I go looking...too

SnoopyLovesYou · 29/07/2013 09:34

Oh dear!

Yes I think my POF profile is going in the bin.

Match profile I will consider later but in the meantime, I need to get out into the real world and see if I can meet somebody that way!

:-)

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SnoopyLovesYou · 29/07/2013 09:39

To be honest, I think I'm just lonely because I don't go out much and haven't fully developed a solid friendship group. I do really need to forget about looking for men and concentrate on me!

:-D

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TwoStepsBeyond · 29/07/2013 10:44

Snoopy, I have met a lovely man on POF and I know others have too. People say you get better people on the paid sites (more serious and more solvent ) but actually a lot of them will also put a profile on the free sites too,. why not? I was just looking for a few dates and a bit of flirting, not expecting to meet the love of my life, so didn't want to pay for the privilege.

I met 5 lovely guys, once I didn't fancy, but seemed very nice, who I met up with 3 times, just for coffee and chatting.

One I had a cheeky snog with but think I liked him more than he liked me, so gave up on that.

One I knew from elsewhere and saw him on OD site so we met up just as friends a few times, nice to be able to go for a drink/dinner with no expectations.

Next was was totally gorgeous, seemed really sweet too, had dinner and a coffee in the park, kiss on the cheek, but no groping or inappropriateness, seemed keen but he was just not that into me really busy with work, so second date was tricky to organise.

Last one was my soul mate. Been with him for nearly a year and love him to bits.

I had no idea how bad it could be until I read some of the horror stories on here - I got away lightly it seems! I know there is a lot of sieving to be done to get rid of the weirdos and married men, but actually I never found any nutters on there.

Obviously DP is not perfect, but he's pretty damn close and there's no way I would have met him without OD as we don't move in the same circles, despite living only a few miles apart.

MoreThanWords · 29/07/2013 12:01

Snoopy I too am lacking in a friendship group; and hobbies; and free time .......

I have spent almost six months as an inadvertent OW so still recovering from the shock of that and getting over the broken promises and dreams of a life together etc. As, presumably is his DW! Another crap excuse for a man.

I am 'myself' til I get to the 2nd date and then I turn all compliant/ submissive etc. I liken it to Julia Roberts in Runaway Bride where she doesn't actually know how she likes her eggs because she has always just said the same as the guy she's dating.

I am hoping if I don't go out of my way to find someone, they'll just appear lol.

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equinox · 29/07/2013 12:21

Girlies if you join meet up dot com and peruse which areas of interest you have you can go out to those meets there are men out there as well as women and it isn't for pulling purposes. Provided of course you have the spare readies and childcare funds at hand in the event of an unhelpful ex not doing child sitting for you.

Whereas I am rather lazy socially I have found it quite an ideal way to get to know people of both genders on a friendly footing without feeling it is a knocking shop.

At least it is a few more people to add to your facebook list! Although having said that I am taking a break from facebook for now lol. It is too time consuming...

HTH.

bluebeardsbabe · 29/07/2013 14:23

Well I flirted with a builder in a lunch queue today...that's more than I have done in a year. baby steps...

SnoopyLovesYou · 29/07/2013 18:37

Well my two latest POFs that I've been e-chatting with are

-married but separated but don't want to get a divorce. I'm staying away.

-Has a lover in another city. Doesn't want a relationship. Just 'fun.'

I'm not going to meet either of them. Yawn!

Poster above: Please share with us how you manage to filter out all the unavailable/ inappropriate ones :-)

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