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Right! Where do we find nice single men?!?!

(193 Posts)
SnoopyLovesYou Sun 28-Jul-13 16:03:34

Ok everybody! Where do us single parents meet attractive, nice, single men?

The local gym/ swimming pool?

Online dating?

Clubs & pubs?

Sports clubs?

Evening classes?

I know I've previously said Im happy being single and I am but I'm also young and red blooded and in need of male attention atm!

If we put our heads together, we might be able to find one or two between us?


OP’s posts: |
bluebeardsbabe Sun 28-Jul-13 17:34:31

After reading a few threads on here I did try plenty of fish but I fear I won't be on there for long. I actually hate online dating. I just thought I might feel better if a few men contacted me to say I looked nice smile FYI...I don't!

I know a few people who have met people at the gym and I have myself been a member of one (can't afford it at the mo) and I would say there is quite a lot of flirting to be done there.

What about through mutual friends? Or reuniting with people through social media, ie people who you went to school with etc. Just a thought.

I am so ready to date though, or at least have a man look at me and say 'well you seem nice'. I am hoping this is possible with a 9 month old baby in tow!!!

BusyHomemaker Sun 28-Jul-13 20:34:49

If you find any please point them my way! ;)

SnoopyLovesYou Sun 28-Jul-13 21:21:21


I didn't know the gym was a pick up joint!!!!!!

Do people actually meet there????? Wow!!!! Like swapping numbers and all?

As for mutual friends, yes that might happen by itself but I feel I need to do some pro-active things too.

OP’s posts: |
bluebeardsbabe Sun 28-Jul-13 21:23:40

I have a friend who met her husband at a gym...ok so they are now in the middle of an acrimonious divorce but still!!!

I also have a friend who now has 3 kids with a man she met at the gym, and so far they are still together smile

Just look for needle tracks in arms to sieve out the ones who are on steroids and you will be fine.

Might have to join up again, sigh.

ImNotBloody14 Sun 28-Jul-13 21:27:26

Definitely NOT plenty of fish! <shudder at the memory>

SnoopyLovesYou Sun 28-Jul-13 21:32:01

Aha! The gym is where they're all hiding. I HATE the gym! What about swimming pool/sauna?

OP’s posts: |
SnoopyLovesYou Sun 28-Jul-13 21:35:53

I thought I should specify that I am not interested in one night stands, online sex meet ups or any other weird sleazy stuff. I want to meet someone who's like a human. Someone I can have a connection with. (I'm sure we all actually want this just thought I'd point out that I'm not interested in just sex.)

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ImNotBloody14 Sun 28-Jul-13 21:39:41

Someone that's like a human? grin

Honestly i would prefer someone that's like a dog, loyal, cuddly, quiet, lends a listening ear and keeps the bed warm grin of course that would all be great if it came im human form.

SnoopyLovesYou Sun 28-Jul-13 21:40:04

Anybody know anywhere else to meet people? What about when with kids? Park, beach? On holiday? I really sound desperate! I'm not. Just still young and in need of a bit more fun in my life!

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MoreThanWords Sun 28-Jul-13 21:41:29

I met a not so fucking single after all dad at the swimming pool - our kids were both having lessons.

Have met alcoholics, married/attached men, depressives, drunk drivers, a guy who put my hand on his erection an hour into the date walking round the park, and a guy who was on the sex offenders register, on Plenty of Fish.

Have swapped numbers with a guy from a petrol station - our eyes met across the unleaded...... - nope, depressive alcoholic.

Daughter's friend's dad, divorced, utterly reliable, dependable, faithful, perfect on paper, etc, etc, CRAP CRAP CRAP kisser.

I am currently debating whether to join Match - I've registered without a photo, and the barest of details, and they've sent me a 30% off code, but I'm not sure I can be bothered. I hate first dates! There's not really much hope, is there, lol.

SnoopyLovesYou Sun 28-Jul-13 21:43:27

14 you're so funny!!!! I'm at a point where I really DON'T want a dog. I really shouldn't be looking to men for affirmation. I know I shouldn't. Not a good idea. I'd like someone independent. You're right. It's a cat I need ;-)

OP’s posts: |
SnoopyLovesYou Sun 28-Jul-13 21:48:23

Well more than words if he's a crap kisser we all know what that means!

Sigh. Yes POF really is full of total weirdos isn't it? Surely there must be some nice honest people on it no?

Yeah I've considered Match too but then are we sure that they're not just as weird and desperate too? I don't think I can bear to pay for it!

OP’s posts: |
ImNotBloody14 Sun 28-Jul-13 21:49:51

No cats leave you- bastards! hmm grin

SnoopyLovesYou Sun 28-Jul-13 21:57:52

Are we talking about cats here or independent male humans? ;-)

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ImNotBloody14 Sun 28-Jul-13 22:04:45


They all leave me


MoreThanWords Sun 28-Jul-13 22:05:44

I've been talking through my appalling dating history with my counsellor; he has pointed out I've had no decent male role models in my life, so that's why I'm struggling to 'be' in a decent relationship. I thought he would be telling me to stay single until I love myself etc, but actually he's quite excited about me going out dating as the new "counselled" me! I might leave it a bit longer yet confused

No-one at work worth shaving my legs for either except the under 30 year old and I am old enough to be his bloody mother

SnoopyLovesYou Sun 28-Jul-13 22:19:35

That is fascinating! I have had no decent male role models either! Probably that's what's wrong with me too! What has he done with you to make you ready Id love to know! Is your counsellor kind of like a new role model or something?

OP’s posts: |
buthow Mon 29-Jul-13 08:16:52

MoreThanWords me too got some one forcing ma head to go dwn to his horny penis in like an hour of meeting...gees was disgusted he listened to all soapy stories I told him abt ma life in the 1st minutes of meeting..ohw we seemed to hv a lot in common decent n handsome guy n I'm like "Lord thanku I thnk finally I'm there" only to later see my head forced dwn to e dick an hour later in the car n I'm like "waaaaaat" Geees...

Anyway it was too good to be true men dnt easily fall for 16 weeks preg women do they? So I also would like to know were the cool dudes who want something real are found so tht wen I pop I go looking...too

SnoopyLovesYou Mon 29-Jul-13 09:34:38

Oh dear!

Yes I think my POF profile is going in the bin.

Match profile I will consider later but in the meantime, I need to get out into the real world and see if I can meet somebody that way!


OP’s posts: |
SnoopyLovesYou Mon 29-Jul-13 09:39:11

To be honest, I think I'm just lonely because I don't go out much and haven't fully developed a solid friendship group. I do really need to forget about looking for men and concentrate on me!


OP’s posts: |
TwoStepsBeyond Mon 29-Jul-13 10:44:53

Snoopy, I have met a lovely man on POF and I know others have too. People say you get better people on the paid sites (more serious and more solvent wink ) but actually a lot of them will also put a profile on the free sites too,. why not? I was just looking for a few dates and a bit of flirting, not expecting to meet the love of my life, so didn't want to pay for the privilege.

I met 5 lovely guys, once I didn't fancy, but seemed very nice, who I met up with 3 times, just for coffee and chatting.

One I had a cheeky snog with but think I liked him more than he liked me, so gave up on that.

One I knew from elsewhere and saw him on OD site so we met up just as friends a few times, nice to be able to go for a drink/dinner with no expectations.

Next was was totally gorgeous, seemed really sweet too, had dinner and a coffee in the park, kiss on the cheek, but no groping or inappropriateness, seemed keen but he was just not that into me really busy with work, so second date was tricky to organise.

Last one was my soul mate. Been with him for nearly a year and love him to bits.

I had no idea how bad it could be until I read some of the horror stories on here - I got away lightly it seems! I know there is a lot of sieving to be done to get rid of the weirdos and married men, but actually I never found any nutters on there.

Obviously DP is not perfect, but he's pretty damn close and there's no way I would have met him without OD as we don't move in the same circles, despite living only a few miles apart.

MoreThanWords Mon 29-Jul-13 12:01:45

Snoopy I too am lacking in a friendship group; and hobbies; and free time .......

I have spent almost six months as an inadvertent OW shockshockshock so still recovering from the shock of that and getting over the broken promises and dreams of a life together etc. As, presumably is his DW! Another crap excuse for a man.

I am 'myself' til I get to the 2nd date and then I turn all compliant/ submissive etc. I liken it to Julia Roberts in Runaway Bride where she doesn't actually know how she likes her eggs because she has always just said the same as the guy she's dating.

I am hoping if I don't go out of my way to find someone, they'll just appear lol.

equinox Mon 29-Jul-13 12:21:07

Girlies if you join meet up dot com and peruse which areas of interest you have you can go out to those meets there are men out there as well as women and it isn't for pulling purposes. Provided of course you have the spare readies and childcare funds at hand in the event of an unhelpful ex not doing child sitting for you.

Whereas I am rather lazy socially I have found it quite an ideal way to get to know people of both genders on a friendly footing without feeling it is a knocking shop.

At least it is a few more people to add to your facebook list! Although having said that I am taking a break from facebook for now lol. It is too time consuming...


bluebeardsbabe Mon 29-Jul-13 14:23:49

Well I flirted with a builder in a lunch queue today...that's more than I have done in a year. baby steps...

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