what do i tell my kids!!

[fatheroftwins]

Hi i am a single full time father of twins of 3 and a half,one boy and one girl.They dont see their mum due to the fact shes an addict and was wondering what to say to them about their mum as even now kids at nursery ask me where their mum is so no doubt they are being asked to.As all the kids get picked up by their mummies and they get picked up by me..I have been dreading this question and i know its only going to get worse in years to come any ideas would be much appreciated thanx

[samandkat]

You could say she is very poorly and that she will be back one day when she is better

Or if you think that there mom will never be back then you can simply say that you dont know

[cestlavielife]

yes say a version of the truth.

if you need some help ask for referral via hv or gp to play therapist/family therapist - they can help them deal with this.

they can also talk you thru what to say to them.

also if she does come back into their lives at some point you and they might want support.

[foofooyeah]

I agree with cestlavie - i would ask for professional help on this. You dont want to lie to them but you also need to be economical with the truth. Its a sad and difficult situation.

[cestlavielife]

play therapist will use toys and things and play to help them process this situation and will help you too.

[fatheroftwins]

oh really i didnt realise i could get help via gp...Will give that ago for sure..Thanx ladies

[DeskPlanner]

Good luck.

[fatheroftwins]

thanx desk planner

[claraschu]

Just wanted to say, they are lucky to be picked up by a caring dad. I bet the other kids will be jealous as time goes on. Fathers are just as good as mothers, and sometimes a hell of a lot better, so don't create a problem if none exists.

I'm not minimising how hard this is for you, just saying that they are lucky to have you, and you are not second best to a mum.