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CSA- I owe HIM

(44 Posts)
mummystudent Sun 28-Apr-13 14:34:56

My ExP has gone to the CSA with a change in circumstances, new job etc.

Now he reckons I owe him about £480, which is fine, I put our son's money into savings as I have a high income job, and can access the funds to give back to him...

However, I'm thinking he will not transfer it into the savings account HE has for our son (his new job is less money than his old?), which would really p**s me off.

What should I do?!

Mutt Sun 28-Apr-13 14:37:20

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

alienbanana Sun 28-Apr-13 14:37:32

Surely you don't get a say in it?

freddiemisagreatshag Sun 28-Apr-13 14:38:08

How is it any of your business what he spends it on?

mummystudent Sun 28-Apr-13 14:40:55

Well I kinda thought it was my business since he told me to put it in my son's savings account and not spend it... So... Yeah. Since I did do that then I would expect him to extend the same level of respect.

Mutt Sun 28-Apr-13 14:41:45

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mummystudent Sun 28-Apr-13 14:41:52

Also can anyone tell me why I have to pay it back when he didn't inform them of the change until 3 months later?

Mutt Sun 28-Apr-13 14:42:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

freddiemisagreatshag Sun 28-Apr-13 14:42:23

You should have told him to get stuffed wrt the putting it in a savings account.

mummystudent Sun 28-Apr-13 14:42:38


freddiemisagreatshag Sun 28-Apr-13 14:42:46

You do because they say you do and those are the rules, assuming the CSA have ruled to that effect.

mummystudent Sun 28-Apr-13 14:43:29

The CSA haven't said anything, he's the one who has said it.

freddiemisagreatshag Sun 28-Apr-13 14:43:51

Well, tell him to go to the CSA and tell them and let them work it out, that's what they are there for.

Fleecyslippers Sun 28-Apr-13 14:45:24

Pay it back, then imagine him spending it on a stupidly expensive meal with champagne and sea food. Then getting food poisoning from a dodgy scollop and sour Bollinger. REALLY bad food poisoning wink

Sometimes it's just not worth fighting. He sounds like an arse. In future tell him to stick his opinions on what you spend CM on up hs jacksy grin

betterthanever Sun 28-Apr-13 14:45:25

You don't have to put the money in a savings account and neither does he. It is quite equal in that respect. Sorry to hear you are loosing maintenance but it doesn't sound like it will be too much of a problem. Do as you wish with what he will/has given you and move on.

Mutt Sun 28-Apr-13 14:46:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fleecyslippers Sun 28-Apr-13 14:46:22

Wait - just read that it's HIM saying this. Not the CSA.
Until you get official word, tell him to go whistle wink

mummystudent Sun 28-Apr-13 14:48:29

Well @Mutt, I got a letter stating I was getting less- fair enough.

Then he has text me today saying I owe £480 and when can I pay it back?

We have one of those 'agreements' not the one which is forced (excuse my ignorance with the technical terms) so I just assumed he could ask for it?

Trill Sun 28-Apr-13 14:48:50

If the CSA say he has to give you money, he should give you money and he has no say in what you do with it.

If the CSA say you have to give him money, you should give him money and you have no say in what he does with it.

Leave it at that.

freddiemisagreatshag Sun 28-Apr-13 14:49:41

If it's through the CSA then let them decide.

Ring them and ask them if you have anything to pay back before you hand him a penny. And if you do, make sure it goes through the CSA as well, so it's all nice and official.

tribpot Sun 28-Apr-13 14:50:22

You seem to be in the habit of taking financial instruction from your ex. Here's my idea: tell him to go fuck himself. And that you'll deal with the CSA when they contact you.

rainbowslollipops Sun 28-Apr-13 15:57:52

Never take instructions from your ex or believe him financially.

alienbanana Sun 28-Apr-13 17:41:44

It doesn't sound like you owe him anything tbh.

So he's been paying x, but has now gone through the CSA and they've told him he only needs to pay a certain amount which is less than x. He's decided that he's been overpaying to you and that he wants it back?

(or have I got my wires crossed?)

alienbanana Sun 28-Apr-13 17:43:23

Or is it that he was paying the right amount according to salary, but not circs have changed and now he pays less a month?

Either way you don't owe him anything

kinkyfuckery Sun 28-Apr-13 17:47:28

Don't pay back anything until you get work from the CSA (though would they not just reduce his payment to you, rather than ask you for a payment back?).
It's none of your business what he does with it though, like it isn't his business what he does with the payments you receive.

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