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should i go through CSA or leave it?

(6 Posts)
cappuccinodays Tue 26-Mar-13 23:29:41

Just looking for advice really. My ex husband has always made regular payments worked out by himself according to the CSA calculator.
He has worked for the same company for years, always had wage increase and payday the same date. He now says his pay increase has changed to different time of year and also his payday has changed. I asked if i could see his payslip and he said he was "disappointed" as it shows i don't trust him.. hello, he left me overnight with an 18 month old baby. disappeared, no explanation... should i trust him? (another story)
so the payment date has changed by 1 week. I therefore miss out on 1 week...
shall i challenge him? do i go through CSA or will that make it worse?
always been fairly amicable, on my side, but i am fed up of it and feel like i am being walked all over.

anqet Wed 27-Mar-13 10:09:15

I wouldn't contact CSA only for this. You could ask for the money for an extra week, easy to do the math just divide the monthly amount by 4.33 or use the CSA calculator. Or, just ask him to buy something for the child(ren) instead. Something that they need, like shoes or anything like that.

Why are you fed up with it? Is he paying less than he should? Missing/late payments otherwise?

cappuccinodays Wed 27-Mar-13 12:26:03

thanks for reply. No idea if he is paying less than he should be as i dont know how much he earns.
I think anget, I am just fed up full stop, finding it difficult and he is taking our ds away with his new gf over easter.

allnewtaketwo Wed 27-Mar-13 12:31:10

"I am just fed up full stop, finding it difficult and he is taking our ds away with his new gf over easter"

As hard as that may be, him taking away your joint child on holiday should in no way be related to whether you go to the csa or not. A week or so here and there while his T&Cs change at work shouldn't either. Best to keep things amicable I would say, after all you are getting regular payments and it doesn't appear you previously had any concerns about these

cappuccinodays Wed 27-Mar-13 13:08:44

no, you got me wrong. that is not the reason i am thinking of going to csa, that is the reason I am feeling a little low right now, understandably.
He has threatened "you are not getting a penny more than you deserve". All I'd like to know is that I am receiving what i am entitled to, as finances are tight. Is that not reasonable?

anqet Wed 27-Mar-13 14:09:12

@cappuccinodays: the only way to make sure that you are getting the CSA amount is by contacting CSA and filing a claim. Now, that works if your ex is employed. However, you have to think about the consequences of it - you might antagonize ex, it might have an effect on your child as well, etc.

Currently, your child is in a good place - both parents are involved in his life and ex is contributing regularly with money. If you feel that he's contributing significantly less that he should, perhaps it's a good idea to get CSA involved. If it's not that significant, then perhaps it's a good idea to maintain the current state of affairs.

Good luck whatever you decide to do!

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