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Never fails to shock me

(11 Posts)
leaharrison11 Thu 28-Feb-13 20:30:26

So my DS farther has quit his job so he doesnt have to pay csa, going out 3 times a week and gambling. Lives in his nanas doesnt pay rent keep or pay for his food and then........

His mother calls me ( we have a nice relationship) say how proud she is of her son because he is seeing my DS for 5 hours a week and put toys in him bedroom for him to play with shock i kept my mouth shut but all i was thinking was WHAT is that to be proud of ???

Please tell me im right in thinking this ??

Theyremybiscuits Thu 28-Feb-13 20:39:30

I know, I know these individuals are disgusting.

My exh is out of work having received a large redundancy package, has bought a new car, been on a luxury hol, and has spent a fortune on his home improvements...yet when I ask him for some money for food shopping for the children, he says he hasn't any money.

I despair, I really do.

You, like me, keep our gobs shut so we dont bad mouth the dads in front of the children. It is very hard to manage at times.

Theyremybiscuits Thu 28-Feb-13 20:40:17

Oh, and yes, you are very right.

cjel Thu 28-Feb-13 21:01:36

You are so right. Well done for not sharing with her what an idiot he is.!!

kinkyfuckery Thu 28-Feb-13 21:13:36

Disgusting excuse for a father.

leaharrison11 Thu 28-Feb-13 21:26:45

Biting my lip is hard but i think if i rant and rave ill go to his level and he is a blue eyed boy so would get me no where.

The i have no money trick ay.. Ermmm am i not ringing you on your top of the range phone ?

You know what gets me , if we spent all our money on our self an let DC go hungry cold and wet we would go to prison for neglect ( not that we would ever dream of doing that we have hearts and a brain) but we would go to jail but nooo shoe on the other foot its fine and something to be proud of.

Lord give me strength

corlan Thu 28-Feb-13 22:45:13

It is shocking and sickening.

My brother has not been good at providing for his children. My mother never defends him to his ex wife and I really respect her for that.

My Xp's mother once told me that she knows that I do 'about 75%' of the work of raising the child we had together. He pays £8 a week in support and has never had her overnight in 7 years.

I'm afraid I wasn't able to bite my tongue on that one!

leaharrison11 Thu 28-Feb-13 23:06:08

Id have to open my mouth then to

I dont know whats worse the dads or there bloody mothers! Infuriates me

HerrenaHarridan Fri 01-Mar-13 09:00:03

Wow, I can't tell you how relieved I am to see this I a common problem.
Xps mum ha been very off with me since we spilt, made me feel like I'm the bad guy.
Even though I have never bad mouthed him to her, have always enabled her to have her own access to dd, have continued to send birthday cards etc from dd (with hand an feet prints to sign them off) continue to keep her up to date re dd ongoing hospital appts ( even though calling her is agonising!)

I'm doing my utmost to maintain a civil relationship with her so that dd gets to see her family

Yet she still makes me feel like in a complete arse for insisting her drug dependant, unpredictably violent son gets to see his dd in a contact centre.

Why am I supposed to feel bad about leaving him and making a better life for her gc, shouldn't she feel bad for raising that waster!

Sorry didn't mean to rant at you, I just though you might understand smile

cjel Fri 01-Mar-13 11:54:45

Yes understand, Also wonder if you are enabling Xp to look better in her eyes because of your capability? Perhaps if it was up to him to keep her informed do birthday cards etc, she might notice how little he does?

leaharrison11 Fri 01-Mar-13 15:49:51

Completely understand, i had to stop my EP from seeing DS for a while and some of his family still dont talk to me, apparently they want these type of people around the GC neices nephews etc, mind boggling

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