So I'm guessing shall we do a joint present is code for can't you just do it all.

[Lonecatwithkitten]

So first Christmas since split coming up. I have to work Christmas Day so more sensible that DD is with ExH. I have spoken at length to her about this we are having our own Christmas the weekend after Christmas we are both happy with this and are looking forward to it.
So today an e-mail arrives suggesting that we buy a joint present to avoid spoiling her!!!!! And that he thinks we should try and squeeze in a briefer ting Christmas Day.
I am unreasonable to think he is trying to get me to buy and wrap the present just like before so he has to do nothing. With the bonus that I won't actually get see her unwrap it. Then wants to mess up the plans we had made and hasn't thought that actually seeing each other for such a brief period may actually be more upsetting than not at all.
I have already bought what i am giving DD I don't think what I have chosen her is spoiling her (total value £50). Plus actually I would prefer to not acknowledge it is Christmas Day on the actual day and celebrate it on the day she and I have planned.
I feel he is just trying to appease his own guilt and get out of actually doing anything.
Thank you for listening to my rant.

[FannyBazaar]

Let him know you've already done your shopping and made your plans for the day. My first Christmas without ex, he had DS and I encouraged him to take DS to his parents, he was very worried about me being on my own on Christmas Day and suggested I came with him to stay over. I refused because I actually wanted time to myself, have never been that fussed about Christmas and knew that it would be me watching toddler DS while he got drunk.

[IneedAsockamnesty]

In my world if my ex says that it means you go buy and pay I won't give you any contribution towards it but will tell the kids it's from me.

[avenueone]

I am glad you have seen straight through him. Keep to your plans and I don't think there is anything wrong with some spoiling at Christmas anyway.

[CremeEggThief]

Just say no. Even when DH and I were together, we always bought DS something each.

[Lonecatwithkitten]

I have e-mailed with position and can feel the sulk from here. Just reminds why I am better off without him.

[CremeEggThief]

Good for you, OP :).