Advanced search's not all hell

(22 Posts)
peppapigpants Tue 06-Nov-12 18:58:06

First time I have involved them since we split, exH has always paid the amount we agreed between us (although it hasn't gone up in the last three years) which was based on what he said he earned. The only reason I have involved CSA now is that in August DP and I bought a house together and exH said that he would reduce the amount of child support as a result.

Well what a result...the monthly payment will be £295 more than he has been paying for the DC until now!

WildWorld2004 Tue 06-Nov-12 21:14:20

Thats all good but can i just say that even though the csa say your ex is supposed to pay that amount doesnt mean they will do much about it when he doesnt pay.

My ex is meant to pay a grand total of £20 a week & i cant remember the last time i got any money.

Mutt Tue 06-Nov-12 21:20:19

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LivesInJeans Tue 06-Nov-12 21:23:31

Oh dear... another one who doesn't wish to deflate your balloon but....

When CSA first assessed ex, I too was v pleased. He paid that sum for two whole months. That was 2 years ago.

I've given up. The CSA seem to have as well

JaquelineHyde Tue 06-Nov-12 21:24:02

peppa I'm pleased for you, don't let these party poopers ruin your good feeling.

Fingers crossed it all goes smoothly smile

Happylander Tue 06-Nov-12 21:25:03

Get it taken straight out of his wages that is what I do.

Mutt Tue 06-Nov-12 21:25:27

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JaquelineHyde Tue 06-Nov-12 21:27:09

Oh and just to counter act the bad experiences (which I know there are many of) can I just reassure you that having worked at the CSA for quite a few years (some time ago) there are also many, many cases that are assessed and paid month in month out with no hitch.

Peterpan101 Tue 06-Nov-12 21:29:49

I'd try and be 'nice' first......present him with the 'good news' and try and reach a compromise.....better to have him agree again before you try and enforce.

A volunteer is worth 10 pressed men!

daffydowndilly Tue 06-Nov-12 22:14:58

I have to day that the people working at CSA have been so nice, so lovely, asking me if I am ok, being efficient. Sorted out everything with no problems, even dealing with him refusing to answer his mobile to them, they took control away from x, and this gave me some dignity and financial stability back.

He then went and 'lost' his job. Coincidence? At least I have moved on from angry to deep sigh. What a <insert word as appropriate>.

LivesInJeans Tue 06-Nov-12 22:26:35

I agree the staff are unfailingly polite. I feel sorry for them having to ring me up to tell me his contribution has been reassessed from £5.67 to £5.14 but anyway he hasn't yet paid... You can tell they feel embarassed. I just laugh now. It's such a farce. He is hiding earnings AND not paying. Because it's such a small amount it really isn't worth them fighting for it (nor me).

The amount he should have paid per month started at £260. Ah the heady days ... all 60 of them.... when I thought I'd get that each month

whatthewhatthebleep Wed 07-Nov-12 12:48:25

yep...another one here...waiting for the actual money to appear. I was pleasantly surprised and relieved to get the schedule and calculation details, what would be paid and when it would be paid, etc....the reality and best advice to you is this....

Do NOT rely on this money....make sure you have everything covered by other finances coming in....

STIDW Wed 07-Nov-12 13:37:32

The CSA dealt with my claim very efficiently. They wrote to my ex immediately and again about a week later when they received no reply. There was no response to the second letter so CM was deducted from his next months pay and I received it about 6 weeks after the application.

Most people aren't going to give up a reasonable job to avoid CSA payments because in the long term even when the children have grown up they will be worse off. It's more difficult to find employment if they are out of work and they lose out on pay increases and promotions which effects their ability to save for retirement. Enforcement isn't difficult when the non-resident parent is PAYE.

People who evade CM are more likely to work cash in hand, in lower paid or casual jobs or are self employed.

peppapigpants Wed 07-Nov-12 19:43:19

I don't think he will evade paying, he won't give up his job I'm certain. He earns over £100k a year so there's no point in giving that up to save himself a few hundred a month!

iloveweetos Wed 07-Nov-12 20:15:07

WOW i wish my ex earnt that much lol
Im glad CSA have been so helpful, and from experience they have been great and with perseverance, i received regular payments (deductions of earnings order)
they're not all bad? lol

daffydowndilly Thu 08-Nov-12 08:21:16

Peppa mine was earning close to that, but seems he is just a big fat X for a reason, since he did choose to lose his job (because yes not going into work before lunchtime out of laziness, and leaving early makes it a choice). He also thinks he is too poor to visit the children, even while he was employed and earning serious money. Words fail me. He is just so damn entitled. And plays the victim, poor him. <completely pointless little rant>.

iloveweetos Thu 08-Nov-12 12:07:31

daffy..MEN!! they love playing the victim!

daffydowndilly Thu 08-Nov-12 12:23:13

Don't I know it! I lived with one for years that could have taken it up professionally grin.

ivykaty44 Thu 08-Nov-12 13:07:16

my ex contacted the CSA and told them he wasn't working, unfortuantley when they contacted me I gave them his work place and boss name and they did an assesment, he then refused to pay and they took the money straight from his wages. Although the CSA do make cockups they have at least got the money from his wages and they eventually give it to me.

Earlier this year he changed jobs, the CSA contacted him for his salary and he must have told them what he earnt in his last job as I got a letter stating the amount would stay the same. In september they wrote again stating that the amount wasn't correct and there would be an increase of 60 per month, which there has been.

Yesterday I got a letter stating there was back pay and giving a table of how this would be paid... the first back payment is the biggest and is 250 extra and will be paid in December, then the next back payment is aorund 100 and will be paid in January.

As it comes directly from his wages he has no choice as his employer has to take the money and pass it on. The two hardest months of the year and the csa want back payment from march - he shouldn't have fibbed

Peterpan101 Thu 08-Nov-12 18:55:10

May I be allowed to bring this chat back down to ground?

My ex refused me access from the moment I left. No accusations of abuse or justification why. I started CM payments from the following 1st of the month even in the face of some extreme Implacable Hostility.

I am self employed so have a certain 'liberty' to describe what is a reasonable payment based on the 15% CSA for one child. As I am a high earner, my wife with my contribution enjoys a higher income than all of her couple friends with their combined incomes (with CM, CTC, WTC, etc).

I pay the minimum that I should given my earnings. All of the rest of my income is mine to spend on my dd the way I want.

There are some who feel paying their fair share is the right thing to do no matter how much hostility is shown.

QueenofWhatever Thu 08-Nov-12 20:00:31

My experiences of the CSA have been positive and my ex has paid. But more importantly it reduced the power he had over me and gave him less opportunities to bully and harass me for which I am very grateful. He's self-employed too.

stubbornstains Thu 08-Nov-12 20:11:25

Another positive experience of the CSA here...And, to second what Queen said- it feels so good to have an impartial third party as a barrier between you and a "difficult" ex. The tone of voice of the CSA staff as they would recount to me his latest attempts to wriggle out of his £80 a month- up to and including claiming not to be on the birth certificate (not a difficult lie to disprove really!) made me realise that I wasn't the only one to see him as an absolute loon, which I found very reassuring.

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