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ex taking me to court AGAIN

(27 Posts)
mrsmcv Wed 24-Oct-12 07:38:16

I've been in court with my ex husband for six years now, as a result of three court applications he's made for contact. All contact orders have been kept but he always manages to persuade the court there is an irreconcilable dispute which can only be resolved by a Judge. This is true because if I offer a different view, however moderate, to what he wants to do, he simply refuses to co-operate or compromise and back we go again.

I've been out of court for less than three months, new court order, totally complied with it again. Now he's arguing about Christmas because he wants to see dd aged 6 for three days at a time throughout the two week holiday, meaning she is never in one place for long, always on the motorway (His family live 100 miles away and although he has a base in our town, he doesn't actually live there) My suggestion is that he sees her one longer visit, to avoid disruption. He doesn't want that (because it means he will have to take holiday from work. Not an excuse, btw. His employer allows employees to buy additional leave throughout the year, in addition to the five weeks' and eight bank holidays he has already)

Of course, I know he wants to please himself, see his daughter when it suits him and also to ensure that I have to juggle my - substantially less flexibile - work around him

MrsjREwing Mon 10-Dec-12 10:01:00

Can cafcass check for a personality disorder in your ex, npd or (sociopath/psychopath) antisocial personality disorder?

cestlavielife Mon 10-Dec-12 12:37:45

cafcass cannot check - if medical reports are available they can be presented but these disorders are difficult. you cant say he has this disorder therefore this or that court order should be applied. a psychiatrist saying so - well would have to be a forensic psychiatrist i would guess... many £££££££

this is a man who persuades the court and judges...he clearly presents well.

ex stating he has this or that disorder will not go down well.

even with medical reports, you getting into diffiuclt territory with personality disorders in trying to link them with particular behaviours in a court context - you would need a forensic psychiatrist and that is going to cost thousands ..... unless court orders it - which let's face it; they unlikely to do, not when there has been no criminal incidents or recent attempts on someone's life...

op willingly (apparently to others - on paper she happily sends dd off to stay with daddy so there are no problems - not saying she is happy but she does) send dd off to stay with him so there are no clear cut welfare issues - she hasnt felt it dangerous enough to cut contact completely.

BUT as i suggested above she needs to bring up poss emotional impact on dd and these issues with GP and get gp to refer to family therapist.

one would hope the facts speak for themselves - 49 court hearings. regardless of disorder or not.

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