I am at the end of my tether with a massive culmination of tiny things
Since ex had a baby, last year, he won't take children if they are ill. Has no qualms about taking them if baby is ill, as clearly by the time they get symptoms they will be back with me
Sometimes does not give maintenance for three weeks at a time
Doesn't take notice of them went they are there, ds two doesn't want to go
Sometimes doesn't bother putting them to bed, makes them out selves to bed aged six and nine
Has made no effort to learn about ds ones sn
Doesn't 'get' ds two at all, barely seems to know him.
Makes them play upstairs so baby cannot touch their toys
Picks up mid afternoon, drops off mid morning next day when he bothers.
Rarely has them at weekend, always school days.
Had them for five overnights during summer holidays, all separate.
Has to be told to feed them balanced meals
Has to be told to supervise basic self care
Has to be told not to send them to school dirty
Argues with gf in front of them, which they find upsetting
Never arranges contact, it is always left to me to ring him, find out his hours and arrange contact around those.
Lies when challenged, informing me that loads of people in playground have told him I am always late for school. I am never late for school.
The only discipline method he uses is raised voices and moaning. There are no consequences, just moaning.
What would you do?
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Lone parents
Has anyone stopped contact because of low level shitness?
colditz · 15/10/2012 22:57
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I wouldn't stop contact but I would stop contacting him to see when he sees his dc next. If he wants to see them that badly then let him be the one to make the effort. If and when he does and he doesn't really sound that arsed does he, then you can lay down boundaries and rules
He sounds like a right twat. What was he like before his gf had the baby. Maybe it's her being a bit precious about her child although if that's the case then he needs to grow up and realise that his kids are all equal.
He sounds like my own twatty ex. Waste of bloody spaces 
I would stop contacting him for a bit and see if he bucks his ideas up. If he messes you around then march him off to mediation. I know I sound like a mardy cow but I'm a bit zero tolerance on this sort of thing, he either does it properly or stops messing his kids around and keeps away. Being a parent doesn't give him a right to see his DC's and treat them badly 
.
If your DS is starting to not want to go and your X isn't making any effort then I'd cross my fingers it tails off.
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