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Do you lie to cover Ex's behaviour?

(4 Posts)
FourFish Thu 04-Aug-11 13:01:57

Just curious really - ex is pretty unreliable with contact, often late etc and I usually make up a story to cover his behaviour. My baby has tonsillitis so in order to see the toddler he would have to collect her from my house which is has decided is 'not worth the money or effort'. Toddler is expecting Daddy on Saturday and usually I would just tell her that daddy has to work. However, on here and in RL people have told me that lieing is just setting her up for a bigger disappointment when she finds out what an arse he is. So do you lie to your kids? Or tell them the unvarnished truth?
Tot is 3 if that makes a difference

cestlavielife Thu 04-Aug-11 13:05:32

dont lie.
jsut say "he cant come today"
if she says why ust say "he says he cant come today, now lets go play"
distract.

neverontime Thu 04-Aug-11 13:11:42

I do lie to mine, or at least i used to. But things got so bad with him turning up drunk that i stopped all contact telling my DCs (3 and 4) their dad was poorly. They now see him at a contact centre and he has been turning up, so we'll have to see how it goes when football season starts again.

I made the decision to cover for their dad because i didnt want them to think he didnt care about them, or that he prefered drinking to seeing them.
They'll find out soon enough what he's like.

Gonzo33 Thu 04-Aug-11 14:19:18

I never lied to my ds, BUT my exh was supposed to pick my ds up at my Nan's home because of his behaviour towards me. Many a time my ds was sat on my Nan's stairs crying his heart out with his back pack on his back ready to go to his Dad's. I wish it had never been that way, but it was what it was. My DS is lucky to see his father once a year now. My ds's commitment has waned somewhat.

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