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How the hell do you do it?

(9 Posts)
molemesseskilledIpom Fri 01-Jul-11 16:44:08

I'm a single mum to 2, one with a learning disablilty and looking for a job.

There are no part time jobs so I am limited to full time only (great for the bank) but I have hospital appoinments every couple of months for disabled child. I have no support what so ever, no family around me and my friends have thier own kids to take care of.

I'm scared, How the hell do you do it? How do you keep it all going? I dont know if I can. I can with a part time job but working full time is going to be difficult.

Either give me a kick up the arse and tell me not to be so stupid or ignore me.

I know none of this makes any sense but I do feel better for posting this.


Ahhhhh feck.

GypsyMoth Fri 01-Jul-11 16:48:44

how do you manage through the long summer school hols?

i have no family support locally either....5 dc,but 3 are now teens and they do help a fair bit now.

VioletV Fri 01-Jul-11 16:53:06

Tiffany The OP isn't currently working.

OP Go for the full time role and be honest with the employers. Most will try and help you with hours and making them up. Good luck with the job hunting smile

molemesseskilledIpom Fri 01-Jul-11 16:53:38

I'm at home with the kids, havent had a job for a year now so childcare through the holidays hasnt been an issue. That I have to admit has been a god send in that respect, they've hardly been this term.

molemesseskilledIpom Fri 01-Jul-11 16:54:40

Thanks Violet. It's just daunting and job searching for a year with no results has kind of battered my confidence.

Maelstrom Fri 01-Jul-11 16:59:42

the answer to the question that names this thread is "you just do, there's no option".

... and I can tell you that things are difficult and perhaps will continue to be difficult for a while, but do not give up, you can manage whatever life throws at you if you don't tell yourself you can't do it.

molemesseskilledIpom Fri 01-Jul-11 17:01:56

Thanks Maelstrom, I think I'm just having a bad day and it's all got on top of me, so I'm getting moany and teary as a result.

I'll think I'll give up the job search for the weekend and try to get my spirts back up.

Meglet Fri 01-Jul-11 17:06:08

I do it badly. Mum helps me out a lot.

Housework doesn't get done, my health is shaky, my nerves are shot to pieces, kids are 'challenging'.

Other than that we're fine grin. You'll do better than me!

Just be honest with your boss. I let them know my situation when I applied for my part-time job so they knew the score.

AMAZINWOMAN Fri 01-Jul-11 20:23:20

Yes, the appointments with the kids are an extra consideration. I have 1-2 appointments a month with nobody to share the load with.

Depending upon the age of your children you are entitled by law to unpaid parental leave, so go unpaid for the appointments.

You may also be able to do time in lieu which is what I do, ie work through lunchtimes, stay later etc to make up the time you have missed.

You can use annual leave to do appointments.

I also arrange appointments as early or as late as possible to minimise the time taken off work. Yes, it's a real pain though but do-able.

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