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7 replies

giigii · 02/06/2011 01:06

ive not really dated anyone since having my dd and shes 2 i find it so hard when ever i do speak to a man i mention i have a kid and they cant get away quick enough i just dont no what to do i feel lonley i see my friends going out meeting new guys or out with there bf and get a bit jelous i love my dd to bits i would just like sum attention for myself is that selfish

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jasper · 02/06/2011 01:19

giigii don't be sad.
Concentrate on yourself and your daughter for now. She is still very young .
How old are you? I am guessing you have plenty time to find a nice boyfriend or ten Smile

Anyone who can't get away quick enough is probably not a very kind person. Consider your daughter to be a sort of filter for unsuitable men!

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TheFrogs · 02/06/2011 01:50

Yes, hope you dont mind me asking but are you quite young? I was a single mum at 21. If I got a date I wouldn't immediately mention the fact I had a child (not that i'd have lied if they asked). I would go on the date, see how it went and try to weigh up what the date's response to the news might be, if I liked him enough to bother with a second date, if he was interested in a second date blah blah etc. Then i'd let them know without making a huge fuss out of it and take it from there. I've had a fair few relationships which didn't work out but it hasn't ever been because I had a child/children.

Of course, now i'm an old fart most single blokes my age expect me to have kids and have their own so it's not such an announcement or a big deal!

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jamestkirk · 02/06/2011 21:09

i wouldnt worry either if i were you. i am a bloke - tho another old fart:o - and know that a decent fella wouldnt be bothered a bit by you having a dd.
i have 3 kids and had a gf years ago also with 3 - didnt matter at all, tho was hectic at times!

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TeddyMcardle · 02/06/2011 21:15

I know what you mean giigii, my ds is 13months, and I have no one to sit with him so couldn't go out on a date anyway even if I did meet someone fit, interesting and available!
I'm 23 and I know intellectually that I have plenty of time for all that but emotionally I feel rather bereft, I was with ex h since I was 16 and so being part a couple has come to be a big part of my adult identity.
But we will have plenty of time, and children are amazing tosser filters too! But yeah, I get where your coming from.

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giigii · 02/06/2011 22:44

hey thanks for the response i know that i have plenty a time to date since im only 23 i try not to mention my dd straight away as i want to know what there like but if they ask then they run obv only want one thing but jus sometimes on a night when im sat on mi own i just feel lonely when lil uns in bed and would just love that bit of attention for myself but thanx for the responses helps alot

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sleepissues · 03/06/2011 20:01

I know the feeling its a bit lonely isnt it Sad

Cant help you there i'm afraid but you not alone, everyone keeps telling me it will all change when dc goes to school. I'm also 23, but feel that another 3 years of being alone every evening is tremendously depressing!!

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giigii · 03/06/2011 21:18

i know i keep thinking that my dd does keep me busy through day just on the night i feel it more jus be nice to have sum there to chat 2 and have a laugh but yea if i keep thinking about it does make me feel depressed

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