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am i justified on waiting for that "click" ??

(7 Posts)
stretchmark Thu 06-Jan-11 18:21:32

Hiya i'm having a 'i'm going to be alone forever' moment and just wanted to see if i'm being right to hold out for 'mr right' or should i just settle for someone who i care for just not wildly in love with?

See i used to think i'd rather be alone than in a relationship for the sake of it but, you do see people growing old whilst waiting for that special someone and i want to create a family for my ds, and i'd love to get married and have another 2 dc.

Are my expectations too high? confused

talie101 Thu 06-Jan-11 19:53:22

I feel the same as you, just want to create a family for my dc's. Been on my own for 5 years now, several dates but no relationships - if I was single I would have given some of them a chance, but none of them seem the right person to be involved with my children! Maybe my expectations are also too high, or maybe I'm too scared a relationship will go wrong again and we will have to go through the same pain we went through with the divorce?

I could never just 'settle' for someone though, I'd much rather be on my own than with the wrong man. I think you'll just know when the time is right or the man is right, whether you're madly in love or not.

Fingers crossed for both of us and never give up on your dreams!

justonemorethen Thu 06-Jan-11 20:34:34

Trouble is you never know unless you give it a go and as single parents mostly there is too much at stake for trial runs.

Unless you really don't care most of us just have to wait for the click because moving in/moving someone in just doesn't work with kids. I have" settled" but only because myself and DS have had something good out of it. Now that DS needs a proper father figure I am prepared to move on. It's not harder to find a man -it's harder to make a go of it I find because you have other lives to consider.

lilacisinlove Thu 06-Jan-11 20:36:02

I married a man I didn't love, but cared about and got on well with. Since I'm on the LP board, you can guess the outcome. Don't do it.

elastamum Thu 06-Jan-11 22:15:12

You are not alone!!!!Another one here, on my own for 3 years now. Dont know what it is about me but I dont ever seem to meet anyone where it really works out.

Am not prepared to compromise my kids lives though, so expect to be on my own for a while longer sad

elastamum Thu 06-Jan-11 22:17:18

On the family side, I have created a 'family' for my kids. We climb, we ski, we have a really good time. Its just when there are adult events that I turn up on my own and realise how alone I am.

stretchmark Sun 09-Jan-11 18:12:01

sorry taken so long to respond!

grrrr life sucks dont it!!! <<digs out the ben and jerrys>>

I feel like half of me is a hopeless romantic and the other half is a cynical bitch who likes to point out life isnt like the movies!

<<uses the ice cream scoop as a spoon>>

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