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would this bother you

(5 Posts)
twoteens Thu 16-Dec-10 15:03:28

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Niceguy2 Fri 17-Dec-10 08:10:47

As much as I always try to see the other side's point of view, in this case I'm afraid my alarm bells would be ringing too.

If they hadn't been split for a long time then that's one thing. But five years is a long time and the photos smacks of him still not having moved on.

Does he often talk about her? Why did the relationship finish?

Whilst it's not what I would class a dumpable offence, I'd be wary.

twoteens Fri 17-Dec-10 09:50:29

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

elastaelf Fri 17-Dec-10 11:28:04

I would worry more about your gut feel than the photos tbh. I have photos of my ex with my children around still and there are some family portraits with him in them. He is their dad and I didnt think it right to take all photos of them with him in down. It doesnt mean Iwant him back or have an ongoing relationship. They are just part of my childrens family history

gillybean2 Sun 19-Dec-10 14:48:25

If it's a big framed picture full of photos them maybe his ds gave it to him as a gift? Whether via his ex or not that would be difficult to explain removing. Or maybe he made it for his ds which leaves a similar difficulty.

And if he has pictures of his ds in which his ex happens to also be in then that's normal too really I think. But perhaps maybe not to have loads all over the house (which is not what you're saying he has either mind you, just the one frame..?)

I wouldn't be happy with loads of photos about of ex, but I wouldn't expect none either. But perhaps more appropriate to have those that there are put in ds's room. Assume he has a room and stays over at weekends and holidays if not on school nights.

If the question is niggling you try asking why he asked and see what response you get. If he gets a bit funny about it or you're not reassured then perhaps say that such questions are usually asked when something in on the askers mind and is there something he wants to tell you...
Be prepared not to be thrilled with the answer, but if you can discuss it now that's better than finding out further down the line isn't it? And honesty is important. I always feel that even if you don't like the truth it's easier to deal with than finding out you were lied too or mislead.

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