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Have the chance to move to the Netherlands for a year-is this good or bad?

(9 Posts)
Pawslikepaddington Mon 26-Oct-09 07:43:34

I have a (hopefully career enhancing, if not fun anyway) chance to move to the Netherlands for a year. I love working in other countries, and have so far taken dd (5) to Europe and South America for consecutive summers with my job. However, this move is for a year. I have spoken to the school, and they say that her friendships are not cemented enough for it to be a problem (she is a child with a lot of friends as opposed to a few very close friends), and she should be able to get a place on our return. There are three things however that really concern me. 1. dp has to stay in England for his job. 2. dd may not get a place at her school again if someone fills hers while we are away (we have to re-apply as soon as we set off), 3. It may be a huge emotional upheaval for both of us and too much. Has anyone every done this?

Dp and I will sort out seeing each other-we are both up at 5/6am with work anyway, and I get home 4 hours before him some days, and he gets home 2 hours before me on others, so our quality time together is at the weekends. He can come out every second weekend, and we can come home every second weekend, so it would be ok. The rest of it is unchartered territory though and scares me! shock

YeahBut Mon 26-Oct-09 07:56:32

Could dd stay in the UK with dad if the school thing is a worry?
I'm living in NL near Den Haag and a year is not a long time to put a child through that kind of upheaval. The english-speaking schools are great and I'd have no problem recommending the school that the dc's are at. Where would you be based?

Earthstar Mon 26-Oct-09 08:04:42

What would your working hours be and what would you do for childcare?

ZZZenAgain Mon 26-Oct-09 09:26:18

The only real concern I would have in your situation is what school dd would go to if she could not move back into her current school.

Pawslikepaddington Mon 26-Oct-09 14:29:11

There are a few very good schools near us-hers is very low on the league tables, but very high on pastoral care so is in demand, but there are places at other good schools nearby (the main difference being a larger class size and intake-her year intake is only 18, with other schools being 2 classes of 30). We would be in Utrecht, and I would be doing 9am-3pm, maybe 5pm once a week.

Dp isn't dd's dad, that's where the slight problem occurs, as he is wonderful with her but would be worried being her primary carer I think.

Thank you all so much for your replies-I thought I would be really slated for this!

DuchessOfAvon Mon 26-Oct-09 14:41:04

My Dad was posted to the Netherlands when we were in secondary school and commuted home at the weekends. Its very do-able.

We loved it as kids - its a great country and very friendly.

If you have good school provision in your area so you know that on your return she'll get a place somewhere you'll be happy with - I'd do it.

We'd love to take our kids overseas but neither of us have jobs that would make it possible. We are both expat kids ourselves and we both value the experiences we gained from it.

Pawslikepaddington Mon 26-Oct-09 18:23:19

Dp is currently doing a PhD, so despite his strong objections to us leaving him, I think it could do him some good as he can stay late (and be seen to be staying late as he is being funded by his supervisor) and do all his sport at the weekends we aren't seeing him without me nagging! He he!

Dd loves travelling, and spends all her time drawing maps, making up languages, playing airlines and choosing which country/language she wants to learn next, so will revel in it. Peru and Rome were upheavals, especially as we were only there for a month and didn't speak the language, but she adored it, so the slight bit of permanence will be a bonus. I have a meeting about it tomorrow, on Thurs and on Saturday, so am getting rather excited and am having to rein myself in! I cannot do this unless I am 100% committed though, so I need to make sure it is the right thing for all of us, which is why I asked for experiences-thank you all.

I am so glad people have had positive experiences of travel-I can't see me being able to do this once SATS etc start, and dd is feeling a lot of pressure at school already to read, do maths well etc, so maybe a change in focus and system may help her see that it is ok. It could make her go the other way as well, but a break from the pre-SAT stress could be good!

MmeGoblindt Mon 26-Oct-09 18:30:47

We are in a slightly different situation in that we are here for 3 - 5 years but we moved our DC to another country a year ago and so far it has been great.

DD was 6yo and DS 4yo and they have already learned the language (they are at the local schools, I am assuming your DD will go to international school) and have made great friends.

We have done a fair bit of travelling and seen the area we are living in, we feel that we are making the most of our time here.

It sounds like a great opportunity, with few drawbacks.

Veggiemummy Tue 03-Nov-09 19:32:24

We are in a similar situation as DH has a job in netherlands for at least a year. We have just arrived a couple of days ago. We like it so far. Our boys are young 4 and 10months so i think the move is ok. I don't have much advice but if you do decide to come over keep in touch as it's nice to have someone on the ground when you get here. I'm in Den Haag but not sure where we will end up as we are taking a month to find something permanent. Hey Yeahbut did i see you on my Netherlands thread? I'm here finally!

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