US people - how are you?

(21 Posts)
HoldMyLobster Tue 02-Jun-20 21:18:23

Just wondering how you're all doing.

Where I am we've had some protests, and some people have been arrested, but things are relatively quiet here compared to the bigger cities.

Locally I have friends in the police and I have friends who are protesting, and I'm worried about them all.

I thought about joining the protests, but there is no social distancing there. I'm going to donate some money instead - I need to do something.

I have friends and colleagues in other parts of the country who are really struggling - they can't go home because of protests, or they don't feel safe at work because of looting and violence in their area.

But they want things to change and get better too.

Meanwhile lockdown continues easing here - restaurants opening outdoors, shops opening, etc. The death rate is low, and the case rate is falling, but who knows what will happen next?

At the moment I'm quite hopeless that this will all result in any meaningful change.

How about all of you?

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IJumpedAboardAPirateShip Wed 03-Jun-20 04:34:52


I feel very conflicted as it sounds like you do. We’ve done all the marches - women’s march, BLM a few years ago, climate strikes but this has been different. Our city seems to have the longest night time curfews and I don’t know about other places but here the looting appears to be people totally separate to the protests and using the protests for their own gain. Actual protests have been relatively peaceful until after curfew when the police presence has ratcheded up.

I’m ashamed to be afraid to take my kids to the protests and ashamed to explain why we’re not protesting to them (we’re white) so DD and I wrote letters to our mayor, Governor and Senator yesterday.

But then that guilt and fear makes it all about me doesn’t it? It’s not ok. I have a visceral response to just fucking leave and go home, not that U.K. is some kind of utopia (ha! Far from it) but the combination of this all going down in this country yet again because nothing actually ever fucking changes and the lockdown meaning I don’t know when I’ll next get to see british soil let alone my family and friends, it exacerbated everything.

We were slowly opening up but I think everything covid related has been pushed aside now. None of us really understand what the guidelines are now and seeing as the start of opening up was restaurants able to serve people outside, they’re now all closed because of curfew and/or damage.

Our elementary school had lockdown because of an active shooter in the neighborhood (not targeting the school) in February so I basically just want out but in the meantime want to figure out the best way to be a supportive ally while I’m here. But I’m done with America

IJumpedAboardAPirateShip Wed 03-Jun-20 05:00:38

Where are you @HoldMyLobster

Kote Wed 03-Jun-20 05:29:28

We had very violent protests here on Saturday - police cars set on fire, looting, explosions, theft of police weapons. Things have calmed down a lot since but the protests are still ongoing and we are under curfew which was 5pm but now extended to 9pm. The demonstrations tonight are just a few minutes walk from where we live. I want to attend and show support but I'm afraid of how quickly they can turn volatile (+ lack of distancing). It seems like both police and protestors are waiting for the smallest thing they dislike from the opposing side for things to kick off - police spraying tear gas into the crowd with little/no warning or protestors throwing rocks, bottles and fireworks.
We attended a peaceful (and socially distanced) vigil yesterday afternoon which was peaceful yet powerful.
I really do hope that change will come from all of this.

IJumpedAboardAPirateShip Wed 03-Jun-20 18:00:41

The vigil sounds amazing @kote I do feel like it’s a little calmer today and yesterday but am frankly appalled our curfews are so early - I’m in LA but right next to Santa Monica which closed down at 1:30pm yesterday. Makes me sick they’re so protectionist

knitnerd90 Wed 03-Jun-20 18:47:24

I am in the suburbs so it's all quiet locally. I went into DC for a protest--luckily not the one by the White House that got gassed. I have had to hold my tongue with some family & friends back in the UK who think this is just a USA problem. Things are bad here, certainly--but they shouldn't kid themselves.

IJumpedAboardAPirateShip Wed 03-Jun-20 19:31:29

Completely agree, the British have had this holier than thou attitude towards racism in the US without really admitting that the problem here stems from british slave owners putting their immoral actions far from british soils in the first place


Hotchocolatemonster Thu 04-Jun-20 01:47:43

What's happening made me sad, and, a bit scared.

There have been riots and looting in our city. I keep watching news and social media. For the first time in my life there is a curfew nearby.

US has so many social problems, such a shame. This country has so many great achievements and great people. Hope the politicians will stop being selfish for once and really do something to make this country better for everyone, not just for the rich. Same things can be said about the UK.

HoldMyLobster Thu 04-Jun-20 02:39:54

Where are you HoldMyLobster

I'm in Maine, which usually I love, but we have the joy of Trump visiting on Friday! Ugh.

Today I just felt depressed and sad - about Covid, about George Floyd, about the state of the nation, about the future. Economically things still feel trashed. Society doesn't seem to be improving. I could bear the chaos if I felt like it would lead to something better.

I genuinely am now wondering what the on earth July will bring.

Hmmm I am truly a ray of light today! Thank you for listening.

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IJumpedAboardAPirateShip Thu 04-Jun-20 02:47:13

If it makes any of you feel better - we just had our first clear earthquake in a few months....

NeverHadANickname Thu 04-Jun-20 02:54:07

We have just had peaceful protests locally but relatives live in Minneapolis. They left their home and drove here (16 hours if I remember correctly) because white supremacists were targeting their neighborhood. I can barely even watch the news on a morning, it is all so upsetting.

CayrolBaaaskin Thu 04-Jun-20 03:00:54

Ijumpedaboardapirateship - i think you should give yourself a break. It’s quite legitimate to not take your kids to a protest in the middle of a pandemic/ social unrest. Sort of responsible parenting really

IJumpedAboardAPirateShip Thu 04-Jun-20 03:42:47

@NeverHadANickname that’s awful 😔

Thanks Carly, it’s not about me though really.

Has any of this made any of you feel like your time in american is drawing to a sooner close than anticipated?

allfurcoatnoknickers Thu 04-Jun-20 03:47:21

I'm a bit fraught. We decided to stay in Manhattan and ride our COVID, but the looting has been tough. My corner of the city has been quite literally on fire, and everything is boarded up. It's put me properly on edge.

babymakesfive Thu 04-Jun-20 07:40:54

I live in a city that was looted on Sunday. Total devastation, half a block from my house. I have three young kids and honestly, I feel as though I have PTSD. The past few months have been so tough and this has just pushed me over the edge. More protests scheduled for my area tomorrow and this weekend and truthfully I'm terrified they'll turn violent again. Seriously thinking about going back to Blighty for a few months as the US is a real tinderbox right now, and will be right up until the election (or longer if Trump wins)

NeverHadANickname Thu 04-Jun-20 13:15:02

The thought of Trump winning fills me with dread but I fear it could happen. He can do no wrong in his supporters eyes. I really feel for everyone in the areas with rioting, I couldn't cope with it right now.

IJumpedAboardAPirateShip Thu 04-Jun-20 18:17:15

I just have no hope when it comes to elections anymore

knitnerd90 Thu 04-Jun-20 22:37:16

We're more immigrants than expats at this stage--when we decided to try things out in the USA we weren't sure we would stay. Two more kids and a mortgage and we're generally settled in. There are certain things which are better for us here. Most importantly 2/3 kids have SEN and I'm not keen on trying to transfer that to another country, plus oldest is in high school already. So we're here for good or bad.

The riots---it's not really for me to disapprove of them, except for white nationalists who supposedly turned up to cause trouble.

The election isn't looking good for Trump at the moment but 2016 taught me not to be confident!

HoldMyLobster Fri 05-Jun-20 01:12:31

Sympathy to those of you who are in or near areas being looted - that must be awful. I really hope things are calming down now, and things don't kick off again this weekend.

I'm more cheerful today for some reason. We're doing a local demonstration in our town tomorrow, and the demonstrations in the nearby city have been much more peaceful the last two days. I wish those peaceful demonstrations were getting more national and international press, because there have been so many.

We're here for the long haul and tbh I wouldn't want to move back to the UK, although I'd maybe consider moving other places once my last kid finishes high school. Usually I love living here, warts and all.

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IJumpedAboardAPirateShip Fri 05-Jun-20 06:50:53

We went to a small protest today, DD is 8 and since I told her the full story of what’s been going on she’s been determined to show her support.

I just don’t know if it’s a good idea to bring my kids up in this country anymore

Beetle76 Fri 26-Jun-20 20:27:31

Hi all, just found this thread. A couple of names I recognise from a previous thread I posted. I too am struggling a bit with everything that is going on, and I can’t really express what I’m feeling adequately, but it’s good to know others are feeling it too. I hope everyone is doing ok.

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