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Dealing with the sadness when your loved one goes back.

(4 Posts)
DoItTooJulia Wed 03-Aug-16 16:19:33

I don't know where to post this, as I've seen a thread about 'leaving loved ones behind' and it really got posters backs up: I really don't want to do that: I'm already an emotional wreck, but here goes.

Dsis emigrated to Australia.

We were beside ourselves with sadness when she left. Don't get me wrong we're happy for her, for her new life, and new adventures, but it was so sad. We're a ridiculously close family and our DM is quite sick. She will likely never make the journey to Aus.

Then mum got sicker, needed a serious and dangerous operation and 6 weeks of radiotherapy. So dsis came home (less than 6 months after leaving) She stayed with us for 5 months. My DCs adore her. Dsis was an enormous help. It was wonderful having her here.

But she left half an hour ago, and we're all in tears. She was in floods of tears as she got into the car (DH is driving her to the airport bless him).

We'll be on tenterhooks until she gets home. She flew Malaysian airlines (something we discussed she'd never do, but she had a matter of days notice to book the flights, and that flight was the most direct/shortest time, so had no choice to take it if she was going to be home in time).

It's not that I don't want her to go, it's that it seems so sad, especially given the situation with our mum. I wondered if anyone else had the same feelings and wanted to chat?

Fomalhaut Wed 03-Aug-16 22:21:47

Oh gosh it's so difficult isn't it? My family live in a different country to me and I get so sad when we part. There were tears at the airport last time... We are all in Europe so nowhere near as far as Oz. I lived in NZ for a while though and it really does feel so much further away. The time difference is really isolating too.
It's understandable you feel sad. Oz is a long way away. You're dealing with serious illness in a loved one and then waving goodbye to another - totally natural to feel a lot of different emotions.
Daft things help me. We have a family whatsapp group which connects us over several countries for example.

SavoyCabbage Wed 03-Aug-16 22:28:54

I was going to say something similar to formal.

We had a group iMessage going where we could text each other pointless things through the day. You have to keep do not disturb on your phone though at night!

I found it much better than FaceTime as it was less forced, for want of a better word.

DoItTooJulia Wed 03-Aug-16 22:48:40

Thanks both.

She was over with her luggage allowance but having got rid of some of her stuff they let her off with 3 kg. she messaged me once she'd checked in and I know she saw my message back before boarding (guessing she didn't have time or internet connection to reply).

I think her flight was delayed but it looks like it's up in the air now. One advantage of flying MA is that's she's avoiding the delays at Dubai.

My mum has slept most of the afternoon, so I imagine she'll be up for periods of the night tracking the flight. I know she worries about her.

We're pretty good at staying in touch. I like to send letters. Stupid cards. Postcards too.

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