My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Whether you're considering emigrating or an expat abroad, you'll find likeminds on this forum.

Living overseas

Biggest Mistake?

11 replies

amys7 · 05/01/2012 14:29

My family (husband and 5 kids) moved from the US to the UK almost 2months ago. My husband is at work all day, and i'm home with the kids - who have yet to be assigned schools. I feel like we are confined to our house.
I'm starting to believe this move was the biggest mistake we could have made.
I'm not sure what i'm looking for here - just really need to vent how i'm really feeling!

OP posts:
Report
LeMousquetaireAnonyme · 05/01/2012 15:00

2 months is usually when things settle and you become homesick. The new is not exciting anymore, you have no friends, you are beginning to get annoyed at things that are not working properly in your new country...
It will get better. It is just a phase, you are completely normal. You need to keep going and explore go to coffee meetings and parks... (not easy if there are gales), may contact your family and friends a bit more often and try to do nice things all together.
Is there anywhere where you can put your children for a few hours, activities playclub... ?
push with the school, 2 months is a long time to wait
Go on MN local and see if somebody knows about what is happenning around where you live.

Good luck! it will get better! 2 months is too short to say it is the biggest mistake...

Report
frenchfancy · 05/01/2012 16:42

I agree 2 months is a long time to wait for schools. Keep pushing, ring up the education authority and find out what the delay is. You are legally obliged to school your children so there must be a place for them somewhere.

Is private school an option for you?

Things will get much better once the kids are in school.

Report
SeymoreButts · 05/01/2012 21:24

I have just hit the 2 month mark (we moved from UK to Australia) and I'm extremely homesick all of a sudden, I was fighting back tears for most of the day yesterday! I too feel like I'm confined to the house with the kids, we still haven't got a car etc. I miss the place as much as the people. But I'm hopeful it will get better. Have you got any family coming to visit?

Re the school, call the council education department and keep calling. I've been in a similar situation in the UK and was told that we would have to wait until the schools re-opened from the holidays, but even then it was sorted quite quickly. Make a nuisance of yourself.

Report
Indaba · 11/01/2012 21:49

Hang on in there.

We've been overseas for 6 years and have seen lots of expats come out and have real ups and downs.

Sometimes it all seems really difficult...really difficult.

It will probably pass. I think the first few months are the hardest and it'll keep going up and down, but honestly it will get easier.

I remember crying cos I couldn't figure out the stupid electric plug system here. Now I laugh about such stuff.

Now, I know its the best thing we have ever done moving overseas. No doubt!

Get to any child orientated areas. Even if just local parks etc. People with kids are generally friendly and you immediately have stuff in common. Libraries anything like that.

Good luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Report
christie2 · 22/01/2012 11:54

I lived in the UK twice with a large number of children. At 2 months it is still so strange. Give it a few more months. My advice is to get out and about. In London, there is so much to do for kids and no cost. Challenge yourself to go for walks with the kids around the neighborhood and work up to transit if you are nervous. There are so many parks, libraries and playgrounds where you can get out every day and feel connected. Depending on the ages, my life line was a parent/tot group at corums fields where they all my children go even though two were 4 and 5 and not in school at the time. They were very nice and encouraging to me.

Report
christie2 · 22/01/2012 11:55

I forgot to add, the UK people are lovely. Reserved but polite and friendly. I loved it there.

Report
teacakebiscuit · 27/01/2012 09:23

give it time, it will get easier. these are just settling in issues. soon you will come to love that quirky little country with the royal family and the children all in school uniforms and coronation street being on the tv almost every night. and one day you will need to visit a doctor and find it strange and amazing that you don't have to pay any money out of pocket, and will claim the free prescription meds for your little ones and start to appreciate one of the many little things that the amazing little country has to offer.

personally, i would cut off my right arm to move back home to the UK (I'm in the US right now). it's a very special little place where you will be very looked after xx

PS I agree, your life will change when you meet some friends.

Report
Halbanoo · 27/01/2012 10:34

Two months is still very, very early in the process. We moved from the US about 18 months ago and are now only starting to be settled. Getting my son a place in school (well, nursery) helped tremendously in us feeling more "at home."

I've made one great friend so far (and that was a year after arriving) and she has opened up my social life a bit more in recent months. It only takes one...then you get slowly introduced to others.

Give it some time. Things will change for the better, but it won't be overnight. :)

Good luck! (Where in the U.S. are you from, btw?)

Report
juneau · 27/01/2012 11:38

I think anyone would be going stir-crazy stuck in a house with 5 kids - let alone in a foreign country where you don't yet know anyone. So cut yourself some slack - the first year is hard. We lived in the US for six years and I didn't really feel at home for about the first two years.

Is the weather awful? Do you not have a car and live in an area where you need one? If not, can you go to the local park or a museum or something? If you're in a town is there a play centre? Gymboree is a lifeline in the winter if you're in a northeastern city (I'm not sure whether they're in other places or not - I lived just outside NYC).

Report
Halbanoo · 27/01/2012 12:23

Also, have you tried out the boards on U.K. Yankee?---they were a lifesaver for me for the first few months. You'll find lots of homesick Americans there who can relate to your every frustration (It's amazing how "foreign" the U.K. can feel when you're coming from the States, isn't it?)

Report
teacakebiscuit · 29/01/2012 01:14

are you feeling any better?

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.