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Life-limiting illness

How to support husband with Hodgkin's/about to start chemo

5 replies

sausageface · 21/07/2020 11:50

Just that really. My husband was diagnosed with stage 3 Hodgkin's lymphoma and is due to start ABVD chemo next week, every 2 weeks for 6 months (I believe this is the standard set up for Hodgkins!)

We've had a mixed bag of feedback about how he'll feel during this time/how badly it will affect him so I'm finding it extremely difficult to plan how to manage my work schedule to help as much as I can with limited flexibility.. any feedback from anyone who's had this chemo mix who can offer advice?

I'm also looking for little gifts I can buy that could help, from lip balm and fluffy socks to ginger biscuits or just a card to get him through the rough. What helped you through chemo?

Thanks!

OP posts:
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Ladycoo1 · 12/08/2020 06:25

Sorry to hear this. I don't have advice. Just didn't want to read and not reply. Sounds like you are very caring and will be doing everything you can to make your DH comfortable. All the very best of luck.

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AuntieStella · 12/08/2020 06:26

For little pressies:

www.notanotherbunchofflowers.com

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TheoriginalLEM · 12/08/2020 06:32

No experience here (thank the good Lord), but wanted to offer my support.

A friend of mine had breast cancer and i was really moved by a little teddy bear she was given from a friend. It said 'i am a hug from friend, whenever you are sad or scared hug me and I'll hug you back' something like that.

Ive heard handcream is good. Does he have a kindle, maybe a subscription to audiobooks? For when hes in hospital?
My friend felt worse a couple days post chemo, i guess thats when it was doing its thing.

Wishing you all the best cx

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RichTwoTurkeyFriend · 12/08/2020 06:54

Hi OP,
Sorry to hear about your husbands diagnosis. I had a very similar diagnosis in Feb last year (stage 2/borderline stage 3) and had the same chemo regimen you've outlined.
The steroids that I was prescribed largely kept the nausea at bay and I felt ok for the days immediately after chemo. It was days 4-6 after chemo that were the hardest for me, so if its possible to be available to take days off work to provide support and help on those days, that's what I would recommend. I had a number of odd responses as well, including arthritic symptoms on and off for the six months (and I'm in my early 30's so unusual). Essentially I felt low level hungover for the first week (and ate the stodgy carbs and salty foods associated) and then pretty fine the second week.
I managed to go six months without a secondary infection which was in no small part to my partner's rigidity around hygiene (think just below Covid shielding) and me listening and following all the advice I was given to the absolute letter (advised to mouthwash after every meal etc).
Gifts - lip balm, moisturizer etc is nice. Nothing scented, you're not sure when the smell of something might make you feel a bit off. Nice foods but be aware your taste can be a bit affected. I got a pair of lovely pajamas which made me feel good when I wasn't feeling much like getting out of bed (and wasn't feeling very pretty without hair, eyebrows and eyelashes).. And friends clubbed together and got me an oncology massage which was just amazing.

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Sleeptillnoon · 27/08/2020 22:32

Hi Sausage, my husband is 11yrs out from 6m ABVD for stage 3B HL.
I'm a bit rusty on the details as it was so long ago but I do remember he had one bad week followed by one ok week. On his ok week we were able to get out and about, and one thing that definitely helped us both was having a diary/planner which we mapped out for the six months, and planned in some fun stuff. So maybe a diary would be a nice idea? Also I know he struggled to sleep on the night of his chemo due to all the steroids, so an eye mask might be useful to help him sleep during the day?

I think it's hard to predict how your husband will react to the chemo as everyone is different, but one piece of advice I would give him is not to suffer in silence, and to stay in touch with the hospital in between his cycles. They have drugs available for almost every side effect, and certainly with things like nausea there are many different options.

All the best for his treatment, ABVD is not nice but it works!

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