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Near the end for my mum?

(25 Posts)
mumblechum1 Tue 13-Oct-15 23:43:05

Mum was diagnosed with kidney cancer 18 months ago and had advanced Alzheimers and nerve damage from a fall which resulted in 2 fractured vertabrae.
So she's been in a bad way for a long time tho had a good 11 mths roll this aug when she startef going downhill and was in a hospice for much of sept.
She's a 500 mile round trip away but i generally see her fir 1 week in 3 and have been with her for 2 days.
She hasnt eaten for 10 days and as of yesterday can't suck a straw soi've been syringeing water into her mouth, but now she can't swallow so has a morphine pp.
She's q agitated tonight and seems to be trying to tell me something but can't.
Also keeps waving her hands around and touching her face.
Just called nurse out and she said she'll give her a sedative .
I guess what asking is, how long could this go on? Its awful to see and my poor old dad's on his knees with stress sad

mumblechum1 Tue 13-Oct-15 23:44:23

Soz for typos im on phone n knackered

Laststop Tue 13-Oct-15 23:46:47

No advice just didn't want to read and run sorry you are going through this hope the nurse is there quick and settles your mum Down with the sedative give your dad a hug you both probably need it

mumblechum1 Tue 13-Oct-15 23:48:48

flowers thank you x

Doraydiego Tue 13-Oct-15 23:49:35

My dad went very quickly, he was made comfortable with the LCP, is that something that has been discussed? Sorry for you going through this. Wishing you peace and strength.

Bimblepops Tue 13-Oct-15 23:49:53

I'm sorry, I don't have an answer for you, but I didn't want your post to go unanswered.

I'll be thinking of you and your parents. flowers

IamtheZombie Wed 14-Oct-15 00:19:19

{{{ mumblechum1 }}} <ZombieHugs™>

Zombie has pm'd you.

AnnieOnAMapleLeaf Wed 14-Oct-15 00:28:48

I have no advice I'm afraid but wanted to bump this for you and offer my sympathies. I cannot imagine what you, your mum and the rest of your family are going through. For all of your sakes, I hope she passes quickly and peacefully. thanks

mumblechum1 Wed 14-Oct-15 04:19:44

Thanks all. Just got nurse out again as v agitated so she's had more sedative. Hopefully she'll get to sleep for a bit now

Sansoora Thu 15-Oct-15 04:11:47

Nights are very difficult at a sad time like this.

You're in my thoughts.


mumblechum1 Fri 16-Oct-15 09:26:48

She's grimly hanging on 3 days after the nurses gave her 24 hours-clearly she didn't get that memo
My poor dad's heartbroken??

Hollyoaksfan Fri 16-Oct-15 09:34:32

Sorry to hear of your situation op. I work in end of life care and it can be very distressing to see a relative in this way. Hugs to you.

It's hard when the family want them to 'let go' but they hang on in there. I've genuinely seen situations where people have been given 24 hours and they've hung on for a few more days and then when a member of the family such as the wife or husband has said to the person we are caring for 'you can go' they usually do go. I

It is madness how the body works and death in particular. Just make sure she is comfy. Have you got mouth sponges to wet and put in her mouth? That can be easier than syringing for the patient just to wet the mouth and tongue. Keep talking to her to comfort, she can definitely hear you and other family members.

Hugs to you all x

PestoSwimissimos Fri 16-Oct-15 09:35:03

So sorry you are going through this Mumblechum, stay strong xxx

mumblechum1 Fri 16-Oct-15 22:01:56

Thank you all.
Mum passed away peacefully this afternoon.
I'm so glad she went in her own bed surrounded by her loving family.
Hospice at home nurses are bloody fab

janethegirl2 Fri 16-Oct-15 22:06:00

So sorry for you, I hope you are ok, please accept my commiserations.
Just find yourself a nice glass of wine or brandy wine

DramaAlpaca Fri 16-Oct-15 22:08:36

Sorry for your loss mumblechum flowers

Wondererer Fri 16-Oct-15 22:33:04

I'm sorry for your loss x

Heathcliff27 Fri 16-Oct-15 22:34:48

So sorry for your loss thanks

AnnieOnAMapleLeaf Sat 17-Oct-15 00:07:11

I am glad it was peaceful but am so sorry for your loss. thanks

echt Sat 17-Oct-15 02:38:42

For all your sakes, I'm glad there was comfort at the end. Sorry for your loss, mumblechum thanks

SilverNightFairy Sat 17-Oct-15 02:48:20

Sending hugs on the passing of your mum. I hope that you are with people that love you and loved her. Please take care of yourself over these next days flowers

Sansoora Sat 17-Oct-15 05:32:22

Im very sorry you've lost your mum.


knaffedoff Sat 17-Oct-15 06:19:11

I am so sorry for your loss, big hugs to you and your dad flowers

sandgrown Sat 17-Oct-15 06:22:38

So sorry for your loss. Love to you and your dad flowers

PestoSwimissimos Tue 20-Oct-15 14:01:34

Sorry to hear about your Mum flowers

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