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Dads chemo mismanagement what next !!

(4 Posts)
whatisforteamum Wed 17-Dec-14 22:00:37

so Dad goes to chemo after the onco thinks he has already had some and has the anti sickness and flush through then get told sorry we cant give this to you it apppears to be the wrong mix!!
well versed in chemo Dad it 2 yrs ago,Mum 2 yrs ago and 7 ago.He is furious.I guess waiting 18 weeks to get started now it will be in the new yr.
Dad knows he has aggresssive incurable cancer and this is a huge strain on he and Mum who sees her onco in feb.He has written a complaint and macmillan have told me as its incurable and pallitive to control symptoms the timing is not so pressing but still not good enough and perhaps he is bending the truth (he isnt he went to the hosp today).
If anyone at work is petty or tells me we are all going to die and life is a bitch i will scream (the guy had a breakdown when his 3 month relationship ended).
Sorry for moaning my Dh has been given a clean bill of health from his heart attack but continues with some anger and ED.I just wanted to get things off my chest,
I hope everyone on here has some kind of peace and happiness this christmas xx

whatisforteamum Mon 22-Dec-14 08:52:30

well dad had a bad sat night.He had a pint of beer at Rugby which he is blaming for excruciating stomach pains and pains from his bladder where the biopsy was taken.I offered to take him to A and E which he declined and kept saying he has chemo on 7th jan.He is clinging to this fact as it will be 22 weeks since his aggresive type of cancer returned.I can tell by his voice he is worried.Dad is usually a very positive man...it is heartbreaking to hear all the time Mum who he has been with 50yrs is concerned but helpless and waiting for her oncology appointment.

Spickle Wed 24-Dec-14 15:18:47

In the circumstances I do hope you have a lovely Christmas with your nearest and dearest and if it happens to be the last Christmas for your dad or mum, then I hope you make some lovely memories together at this festive time.

My DH died from cancer shortly after Christmas six years ago and I travelled by busy commuter train to visit him in hospital, having to listen to numerous telephone conversations or chatty groups bemoaning their jobs/money/hair/irritating people etc etc. I sat there thinking how trivial it all is compared to what we were going through but you have to block it out. Those people are lucky they don't have anything more serious to moan about but one day it will be someone else's turn and then you can offer a shoulder to cry on knowing that you really understand how they feel because you've been there before, and those people are the ones who are a great comfort and support at such a time.

whatisforteamum Wed 24-Dec-14 21:17:44

Thank you spickle i do at least have my christmas wish that they are still all here.I feel more positive today as i realise we have at least had yrs since they were diagnosed.I am not even thinking of it as their last like i did in 2012 when they both had chemo and were bald and ill.It is their 50th xmas together !!I never envisaged all 3 of my closet family would be seriously ill so close together.
I am sorry you lost your DH to cancer.It is such a cruel illness.Wishing you a peaceful Christmas xx

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