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any people on here, partners with crohns or have crohns?

(5 Posts)
immortalwife Fri 18-Apr-14 00:29:38

Want want a RL assessment of everyone's experiences.

My DP has crohns. He's a wonderful man, even if he's sick and tired often. He's thoughtful, kind, caring, and a brilliant daddy.

I just worry that he takes every time he's ill, a bit too much to heart, as he says he'll never get that time back with me and dd. Never know what to say to that really. He gets lots of quality time still.

Any warriors/partners of warriors on MN???

Brakeover Fri 18-Apr-14 11:42:50

Crohns is a tough illness to have in that its lifelong and unpredictable, painful and tiring. I think it's really tough psychologically too to come to terms with.

Wishing your dp well x

nearlyreadytopop Fri 18-Apr-14 16:55:02

Dh has crohns. He had a large portion of bowel removed after a particularly bad flare up before we met. Since then (touch wood) with careful attention to what he eats he has been fine.
I must admit I know very little about it but listening to him describe what he went through I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

gobbin Thu 27-Nov-14 10:42:43

Everyone's experiences of Crohns are different. It's a weird thing in that one person can be fine, even off the meds at times and then have big relapses, another will have it rumbling along all the time with issues on the way (that's me).

Some drugs suit some people but not others. Two Crohnies side by side may be on quite different treatment regimes.

It's amazing how many people have heard of Crohns and this is a good thing, but most will never truly understand how rough you can feel just doing ordinary things. I always say that 'Your 100% energy and good health is my 80%'. If I get anything on top of that such as a cold or flu then I'm down to 60% functionality very quickly.

However, reassure your DP that there are some excellent treatments out there and research into its causes is ongoing. Surgery is not a cure but will buy time. It is likely to happen at some point, but only if really necessary.

He should try not to dwell on the negatives - children are very adaptable and their 'norm' is a daddy who sometimes needs extra rest. They will accept this as they don't know any different. When the sun shines, make hay!

bananaramadramallama Sat 29-Nov-14 15:01:54

Hi, I am 39 with 2 boys and have crohn's (diagnosed last year), I had a bowel resection and fistulas removed in Feb this year, I had steroids for a while last year too.

Mostly I am ok, tiredness can be a problem (I had iron infusions intravenously which were amazing, am not borderline anaemia for the first time in years now!).

My sister has been diagnosed this year, and another person at my work has been recently diagnosed - we all suffer differently, as Gobbin said (gobbin actually reassured me on a thread last year around this time when I was in a panic (I was a different name) - thanks gobbin!).

My 2 boys are 9 & 12, and although I have had to miss some things due to being ill, I've joined in with hundreds more than I've missed.
I'm still struggling mentally with accepting that I can't control this (completely against my psyche), but it's not life destroying - I think it just takes time to accept it iyswim (and I'm not fully there yet by any means).

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