Hello all.
Not sure if you can help with this - hope I've posted under the correct topic.
A little bit of background: four years ago my father died after an unpleasant illness. Last September my mum moved out of the family home, which was obviously a big upheaval for her. In November, she was diagnosed with an aggressive form of breast cancer and had a mastectomy with some lymph nodes removed as well. She then went on a course of chemotherapy, followed by radio therapy. As a result of this treatment, she lost her hair and nails and put on some weight.
Just before she was diagnosed she found a boyfriend over the internet. This relationship has dwindled and eventually fizzled out as her treatment progressed.
The problem, and I'm not even sure if it is one, is that she has started making some odd clothing choices. She has been wearing very short dresses and skirts so her underwear is on display when she sits down or bends over, and she has been wearing very low cut tops so that her breast, scar (she has not had reconstructive surgery) and/or cushion-thing that fills her bra are on display. This has made for some very uncomfortable family meals recently - her two son-in-laws, in particular, feel quite embarrassed. My pop-psychology tells me that she is trying to feel attractive again after a pretty horrendous year - however, I'm not sure it is having the effect she would want.
My mum is in her early 60s and she has always had an eclectic taste in clothing - as have I - but it has never been revealing in this way before. I completely support her right to wear whatever she feels comfortable in or she thinks looks attractive, however I am worried that this may become an issue as she starts to join local clubs or groups (she wants to establish a social life for herself, now that she can). I would hate it if somebody else made a comment to her or upset her in any way about this. She is still very vulnerable about her appearance.
So, I guess the question is: do I try to broach this subject with her, or do I leave it?
Thanks for any help you can give.
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Life-limiting illness
Unusual clothing choices after cancer surgery
8 replies
Skellig · 24/07/2012 12:20
OP posts:
TelephoneTree ·
31/07/2012 13:40
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