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Should I let my 7 yo boy wear nail varnish at school?

(77 Posts)
Twoprinces Mon 17-Jul-17 16:59:44

My 7 yo son has started to want to wear nail varnish at school, the more colourful the better.

I'm in 2 minds as to let him. On one hand he displays several mannerisms that could be considered quite 'camp'. Whilst I'm keeping an open mind at the minute, is 7 too young to suspect your child may be gay, I am mindful that I would never want to impose hetrosexist rules upon him in order that, if he does turn out to be gay, I make him feel that something is 'wrong' with him and cause him to struggle with his sexuality?

On the other hand he does also have autism, which may account for him being non-conofrmist, and is statistically at a lot greater risk of being bullied. I wouldn't want to do, or allow him to do, anything that put him at greater risk and could make his life really miserable.

It boils down to do I make my boy miserable by making him feel weird for his choices or do I allow others to make him miserable by exposing him to bullies.

Please let somebody be able to offer a third way.

Iamdobby63 Tue 06-Aug-19 19:47:51

My son always wanted to wear nail varnish, his school had a no nail varnish policy so it was an evening and weekend thing.... I do remember leaving it on his toes one time and getting the strangest look from one of the teachers.

It’s very difficult because although we may be open to embracing our children no matter what - it always very worrying when the rest of the world is involved. The big question OP is how does your son cope with the bullying he already receives? (I wouldn’t let up until the school sort that by the way). My son wouldn’t have coped (when he was younger) and more wanted to blend into the background.

You could always just say that you don’t believe that nail varnish is suitable for School regards of the schools rules.

Thisandthat1248 Tue 06-Aug-19 14:54:19

If the school allows nail varnish, you don't mind your kids wearing nail varnish and you kid wants to wear it then it seems like a pretty simple answer.

ADropofReality Tue 09-Apr-19 01:00:03

Is there any child left in the 21st Century who is not austistic?

As a nation, we cannot make exceptions for everyone? Someone (or, a large number of someones) have to get on with the jobs without an endless supply of excusing doctor's notes.

HelenCBelcher Mon 25-Mar-19 00:09:17

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

aaarrrggghhhh Sun 17-Jun-18 21:17:37

I haven't read the thread yet - but has anyone pointed out that there is no scientifically established correlation between wanting bright colours painted on your nails and being gay?

yes17 Sun 17-Jun-18 02:59:35

yes, let him wear the nail polish. If the school doesn't like it, they'll get him to take it off. So what if he'd be considered camp? Maybe exposing his peers to the idea that boys can wear it too, they won't grow up using homophobic slurs after pretty much every sentence they use and they'll stop descibing things as "gay"
All these small things, like letting your son/daughter/child wearing the clothes that makes them feel comfortable, even if they don't fit the 'norm' for their gender, could have a major impact on the future (a positive impact though)

AuntLydia Thu 14-Dec-17 14:35:09

I think I speak for us all Leon when I say; thank God you're infertile.

Eolian Thu 14-Dec-17 14:31:22

If I were you, I'd just say that, regardless of the rules you don't think nail varnish is suitable for school.

InfertileLeon Thu 14-Dec-17 14:25:40

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Queenofthedrivensnow Mon 20-Nov-17 15:19:38

So he’s bullied and you want to invite mire?

faintlinesquints Mon 20-Nov-17 15:04:12

Unusual for a primary school to be fine with children wearing coloured nail polish. If it isn't against the rules then why not? Polish isn't allowed at my younger dds schools but at dd1s high school it is and lots of boys and girls wear it.

strawberrypenguin Mon 20-Nov-17 15:00:20

No. 7 year olds are not allowed to wear nail varnish to school. Be a parent and tell him no.

SheGotBetteDavisEyes Mon 20-Nov-17 14:24:29

I have tried to get away with clear or quite pale nail varnish but he's having none of it. He wants bright orange, yellow, blue and green

'Having none of it?' He's 7 and you're the parent. I wouldn't let any of my DC wear nail polish for school in bright colours.

Even when it comes to LGBT issues and kids, it's still possible to simply be really overthinking something.

RhythmStix Mon 20-Nov-17 14:20:40

Is it actually a big deal? why are little children wearing makeup to school? why are parents allowing them to?

SlowlyShrinking Mon 20-Nov-17 14:18:17

Children wearing makeup isn’t very nice (imo) doesn’t matter which sex they are.

Darlingsof Mon 20-Nov-17 14:11:41

If nail varnish is allowed then yes of course let him wear it. We shouldn't prevent a child from doing something that's more associated with the opposite gender. IF he is queer/gay/bi then stopping 'girlie' habits or behaviours won;t matter a jot

noon12321 Wed 25-Oct-17 23:04:59

let him wear the nail varnish. If the school doesnt like it then he can take it off, but if the school doesnt like it because a boy is wearing it then allow him to keep it on.
I'm Not a mum, im a teenager whos closeted but supports all those in the LGBTQ+ community. One way of making him feel comfortable whilst he's growing up and possibly questioning his sexuality or gender, is by referring to relationships with people as "partners" as this won't force him to believe that he can only have girlfriends and that having feelings for another boy is something to be ashamed of. If this had been done for me I believe that it would not put me in the place it has now, as i am trying to come out and accept that i am not straight but gay, which is very hard when you're growing up in a hetero and cis normative society.

RockyBird Sun 13-Aug-17 15:10:59

My kids' school is strictly no nail polish (or makeup/jewellery).

DD, age 6 or 7 at the time, was told off for having nail polish on her tiny toenails by the swimming teacher. I'd forgotten she had them painted.

2ducks2ducklings Sun 13-Aug-17 15:04:27

Most schools don't allow any child to wear nail varnish. If that's the case at your sons school, then yabu.

Orangebird69 Sun 13-Aug-17 14:49:13

Why is this even in LGBT?

SayNoToCarrots Sun 13-Aug-17 14:46:48

My five year old son has worn nail polish to school. At first I said no, but girls in his class have it, so I could see no reason he shouldn't. He proudly showed his teacher and she said it looked nice. A couple of the girls said it was only for girls, but he wasn't bothered. After doing it once or twice it lost its appeal.

titchy Sun 13-Aug-17 12:45:28

even that I necessarily think this is a pre-indicator.

And yet you posted in LGBT children hmm

Ktown Sun 13-Aug-17 12:40:14

My daughter isn't allowed to wear nail polish to school.
And as I am sure many have commented: nail polish can be for boys and girls so that isn't the issue.
Perhaps focus on learning and studies rather than nonsense.

VestalVirgin Sun 13-Aug-17 12:37:19

Children don't see nail varnish as a way of making themselves more appealing to the other sex. They just think it looks nice.

Saying they should be playing with toys instead is like saying children who want to have their face painted so they look like a cat shouldn't "worry about make-up".

SolomanDaisy Sat 12-Aug-17 20:12:47

I don't think he's thinking about the nail varnish while he's riding his bike...

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