DS1 has a friend that he has known since they both joined their mixed sex secondary school in yr7. In years 7-10 his friend attended school in the girls' uniform and was known by their birth (female) name. In year 11 they started to be known by most of the students by a male name of their choice and the school turned a blind eye to some uniform transgressions as they sat their GCSEs. The friend now attends sixth form in the boys' uniform and is known by staff and students by his chosen male name. He wears binders under his clothes, as he has undergone female puberty.
A residential trip is coming up connected with an extra-curricular activity and DS has been allocated a twin hotel room with this friend. The school have asked my views and those of DS. DS sees it as a complete non-issue and says he would feel comfortable sharing with his friend. He has shared rooms on similar trips with people that he hardly knew, and feels that this would be more comfortable for him than that was. He didn't specifically ask to share with this friend, this is just the proposed allocation made by the school.
I intend to follow his lead, and to make no objection to the rooming arrangements. But I do wonder - is the school doing the right thing in allowing this? Should the friend be given his own room? I understand that he shouldn't be asked to share with a girl. But should he be allocated a room with just one male student (DS)? And should DS be asked to share with him? DS obviously would never be allowed to share a room with one of the girls that are going on the trip.
DS is a sensible, intelligent and thoughtful young man who is very supportive of this friend, though they are not best friends or anything like that, just part of the same social group.
I would really value opinions from people who know more than I do, as google has not been tremendously helpful but brings up policies that seem to be suggesting a single room for the friend.
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Is it ok for DS1 aged 17 to share a twin hotel room with a F2M trans student?
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ProfGrammaticus · 05/03/2016 17:49
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