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Can we have a quick poll to help me make a decision please?

(11 Posts)
bibbitybobbitycat Fri 23-Oct-09 22:21:23


DH is freelance. He has been offered a job for June next year which will pay approx double what he would normally earn in a month.

But, catch is, he would have to be away for 30 days.

I know lots of you manage with no partner all the time, and many others have partners oversees for very long stretches (all respect to you) ...

So this question is really for people like me who rely quite heavily on partner for support:

Would you agree to dp going abroad for a solid month in return for double his normal salary, or is it not worth it to you?

DH has said its my call.

lilibet Fri 23-Oct-09 22:23:10

More info needed, ages of children and what support do you have?

SoWhat Fri 23-Oct-09 22:23:44

I would agree to it but I don't rely on DH heavily.

thisisyesterday Fri 23-Oct-09 22:26:15

if i really needed the money i would say yes

as it stands the extra money would be nice, but not necessary enough to make me want him gone for a whole month!

so no, i would probably say no

bibbitybobbitycat Fri 23-Oct-09 22:29:30

Dc will be 9 and 6. Both at school.

DH doesn't do a huge amount around the house but he's good at tidying up. He usually does the dc homework with them and takes them to after school clubs. He is at home a lot, actually, he usually only works about 4 days a week, often in the evenings.

I rely on him as someone to talk to about the dc, tbh.

I have no family help nearby.

missingtheaction Fri 23-Oct-09 22:45:31

go for it

JeMeSouviens Fri 23-Oct-09 22:50:15

DH went away for 6 weeks, 5 weeks ago. I work part time with a 2yo to look after, and no family around (live abroad). Once DS and I got going, it's been easier not having him around tbh (less mess, tidying, and answering of stupid questions! grin).

I am quite independant anyway, so that has helped, and I've enjoyed the time, where I've just been able to focus on DS alone.

Unfortunately I had some health issues just after he left that I had to cope with alone, but all in all it's been really great.

If you're confident you can handle it, plan some nice things for you and the DC's together, go for it. It will fly by.

lilibet Fri 23-Oct-09 22:50:57

Do it, 30 days will pass quickly and you will still have mn smile

stakethroughtheheartofgold Fri 23-Oct-09 22:53:06

so this job is just for a month? and he'll be away all that time? 30 days without a break? and then returns to previous job? sorry, not quite getting the deal.

as a couple we've had money and we've had time and we value time more highly, but we have smaller kids and everyone's priorities are different. we have an arrangement, where if dp does overtime that cuts into normal family time that money is split between us, for our personal slush funds (we have enough money for normal household expenses otherwise). that recognises the additional childcare work it places on me (sahm) for dp to work outside his normal hours.

how much do you need the money?

theDeadPirateRoberts Fri 23-Oct-09 22:54:30

I'm hoping to do this myself quite soon to DH - and I'll set up a video-call thing so I can still take my turn on the bedtime story. IME kids kick off less when there's no second parent to turn to, so you should be OK... [hopeful]

bibbitybobbitycat Fri 23-Oct-09 23:00:38

Stakethrough - yes, 30 days without a break. DH is freelance so does lots of jobs for lots of different people, always unpredictable hours, places etc (right now he is in Italy for 3 days).

We live pretty hand to mouth and don't have much spare, but we are not struggling. This 30 day job in South Africa will pay double what he normally earns in a month.

It would pay for a really nice family holiday plus a few £1000 more.

Writing it all down, my mind is made up tbh. It will be hard on me but worth it to have a few luxuries for once.

Thanks all grin.

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