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advice re name change for my daughter father unwilling to give consent

(9 Posts)
taken4granted Sat 08-Aug-09 14:13:02

my daughter is "known as" my surname at school but I want to change her name legally as her father gets married in december this yr will have same initial for forename as me and obviously daughters legal surname. As my daughter hardly ever sees her father (every 8 wks when he can fit it in) and she wants to be my surname I would like to change her surname properly to end all confusion. her father is reluctant to allow this - purely to annoy me rather than have his daughters interest at heart what can I do?? Also can i have her known as my surname on her medical records????? ANy advice greatly appreciated.

easytosay Sat 08-Aug-09 14:20:58

I wish i could help you but i am also trying to find out if i can change my daughters name too. She has an awful double name and i know she will get teased when she goes to school. I would love her to have the same surname as her brother and i but the ex is refusing. Think it may have to be taken to court? Let me know how you get on and if i find anything out i will post here for you.

taken4granted Sat 08-Aug-09 15:50:25

thanks I would rather not have ot go to expense of going to court although would also love to have his parental responsibility removed as he is not a responsible parent but was told that its a given unless hes a paedophile which is the one decent thing about him! - will keep asking him - I know you are legally allowed to have daughter known as what ever you want in school as I work in a school and we have a number of children known as one name but their legal name for exam puproses are another name. good luck with everything

StewieGriffinsMom Sat 08-Aug-09 15:57:13

Message withdrawn

heavenstobetsy Sat 08-Aug-09 16:02:19

My DP was 'known as' his surname from the age of four - as far as I know, he was always just known as that and the only document with his birth name on was his birth certificate. However, I am sure he alse never had anything official like a savings account in any name whatsoever ....

The only issue arose once he was 18 and wanted a passport - at which point he paid GBP 25 to change his name by deed pole and hey presto got a passport in his 'known as' name

mumoverseas Sat 08-Aug-09 18:50:43

unfortunately without the consent of the father you cannot change DD's name unless you went to Court and even then there is a possibility that the Judge would not agree to the change of surname.

With regards to DD being known as a different name at school, technically her father could insist that she was called by her legal name if he was aware that she was being called by another name.

MissSunny Mon 10-Aug-09 20:41:17

Message withdrawn

Spero Mon 10-Aug-09 20:47:47

The courts take a dim view of you changing a name without consent; the general view seems to be that if a child is not living with the father, this is an important link to him.

Not sure I agree with that point of view, but if you want to change the name and father won't agree, you will have to get it sanctioned by the court. If you go ahead anyway and he finds out, the court could change it back which would be extra trauma.

taken4granted Wed 12-Aug-09 21:35:17

my dd is known as by my name at school as this is her request - it wasnt a very nice split and tbh she reqested my name as she diesnt have a positive view of her father as he never did anything with her pre split and always wondered why I was a different name to her so when we split she nagged for a year before I let her be known as my name to be sure this is what she wanted. Having had a e mail from her father who is stipulating strings attached to a name change my dd has decided she will change her name herself when she is legally allowed ie 16 as she doesnt want to be controlled by her father. ( he was a contolling individual towards me and now he cant control me he is trying to control her.)
So we will plod along as known as until she is 16. or she changes her mind altogether which of course could happen

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