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Never married to father can i change who custody goes to if i die?

(10 Posts)
jellyjelly Thu 10-Jul-08 19:32:25


Sorting out my finance and one thing that has come up is wills

When we were together (xdp - never married) we had our son who is now 5.5 yrs. Born 2003

I would still like my sister to have my son if anything happens to me. I dont feel that my x is suitable as he drinks and quite frankly does other stuff too. He does still see son now.

Can i, as mother just put it in the will or would he automatically go to my x?

Can he fight it if it is in my will?
What happens??

Any advice appreciated.

Goober Thu 10-Jul-08 19:37:17

I think you can, but don't quote me on it.

zippitippitoes Thu 10-Jul-08 19:41:20

you can nominate guardians in your will but the will does not mean that they will necessarily go to those guardians

so you can't be certain by any means

jellyjelly Thu 10-Jul-08 19:42:47

I guess he would have to fight to get my son though??

zippitippitoes Thu 10-Jul-08 19:43:42

does he have contact with him now

FrazzledFairyFay Thu 10-Jul-08 19:46:49

I am not absolutely sure, but I think that if he is named as the father on your child's birth certificate then it is assumed that he will get custody - although that can be challenged in the Family Court if somebody considers that they are more suitable than him.

I am not a Family Lawyer though and I really am not at all certain of the position - I think the law changed some years ago as well - I really would go and see a solicitor or someone your local CAB or Law Centre for some advice so that you are absolutely sure of the position, and can do whatever is necessary.

jellyjelly Thu 10-Jul-08 19:47:32

yes he does,

He is with an emotionally unsatble woman

drinks a hell of alot

has left my son alone in a 3rd floor flat

zippitippitoes Thu 10-Jul-08 21:47:08

i think you need to take professional advice, but if there has been no reason for him not to have access then i would think that he would ask for custody and get it if the court thought it was in the child's interest..a parent will always be considered above a more distant relative if there is no precedent against thewm im sure

but you need to see what a solicitor says

Elloeise Thu 10-Jul-08 21:59:16

I was with my ex for 5 years fell pg with ds and then split up when i was 7 mths pg because he had an ow (whome it turned out was also pg by him hmm)

Anyway he is not on the birth certificate but when i made a will last year there was no problem with me granting custody to my mum and not him.

My mum did the same and made her will out giving custody of me to my aunt and not my dad even though he is on my birth certifacte(some 10 years ago i should add though)

Last mth my dp who has full custody of his ds made a will and granted custody to his brother instead of his ds mother.

So i don't think there should be any problems however if you are conserend just ring and ask. Or better still take advantage of the one hours free legal advice most companys offer.

taken4granted Tue 15-Jul-08 17:59:32

You need to check this out with a family solicitor as he was born after 2003 the father has automatic parental responsibility but I think you can still nominate who your son goes to upon the (hope it doesnt happen for a very long Time ) death - Thats what Im planning to do as well when I have finished mediation

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