Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. Free legal advice is available from a Citizen's Advice Bureau, and the Law Society can supply a list of local solicitors.

Leaving DP and worried about money

(10 Posts)
user1486897010 Sat 11-Mar-17 10:01:42


i have recently found out that i am abusive relationship. were not married but have been together a long time since school and have a dd together. He is an engineer and so earns a lot more than me because I'm just a part time waitress.

i know that i need to leave him but i am just really worried about money. dp owns the house and so i dont think i can get any of that because were not married sad i might be able to stay with my aunt but I'm not very close with my family so not sure what to do sad just wonder if anyone has advice. thanks

JoJoSM2 Sat 11-Mar-17 10:34:21

Seek professional advice. I think you might well be entitled to stuff - you're practically married with a child even if there's no ring on your finger. Do you have a shared account and have you got access to all your money? You could also save up before leaving to tide you over until all financial matters are resolved.

user1487194234 Sat 11-Mar-17 11:02:07

You need to take legal advice As you are not married and the house is in his name you are not in a great position

isupposeitsverynice Sat 11-Mar-17 11:04:31

Speak to your local council, there are resources to help you in your situation - help with deposits and stuff like that. Good luck flowers it is much better to be out and skint than stuck in the shitty relationship, I promise

ImperialBlether Sat 11-Mar-17 11:09:42

JoJo, being practically married doesn't count for anything. This is exactly why there are threads on here saying women shouldn't have children or give up jobs until they're married. People always think the advice is old-fashioned but some learn the hard way.

OP, you need to look online and calculate the child maintenance you'd be entitled to.

You should also look at other entitlements such as housing benefit and tax credits.

If he is abusive you should also contact Women's Aid who will help you get out.

wickerlampshade Sat 11-Mar-17 19:27:32

Practically married means nothing

user1486897010 Sun 12-Mar-17 08:24:09

Ok thank you. Well it doesn't seem good. Can't beleve I'm just gonna have to leave with nothing sad

TreeTop7 Sun 12-Mar-17 08:30:12

He will have to pay child maintenance but it's correct that you won't get a share of the house or spousal maintenance.

You've had great advice here. Women's Aid, definitely. I'd also suggest contacting Gingerbread.

If your aunt will have you for a few weeks, pack up and go to her. If not, Women's Aid may help. Get out of there. It will be worth it in the end.

Good luck.

Thecontentedcat Sun 12-Mar-17 08:41:00

Can you get married and then leave?

user1486897010 Sun 12-Mar-17 09:06:08

Well I don't know when he was planning to get married. I don't know if was soon or not. Maybe that would be the best thing. It actually try and get married

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: