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Being made homeless with a disabled child

(12 Posts)
user1468957602 Thu 28-Jul-16 21:42:24

Sorry if this is in the wrong place. I won't go in to much detail as don't want to bore anyone, but I'm becoming homeless on the 29th of September.

I don't work, I was living with my ex in his property looking after our son and pregnant with his second whilst he worked. He broke up with me when I was 5 months pregnant, sold the house and has disappeared travelling.

Couldn't move in to my mums as she lives in a one bed flat with my step dad. I had to move in with my grandparents as they have a spare room. Had my daughter 14 weeks early shortly after me and ex split. She has just recently got home and is dependant on oxygen with a heart problem, we have home oxygen installed.

Issue is my grandparents smoke heavily and indoors. When she came home I asked them if they would mind smoking outside due to her health. Long story short they weren't happy that I brought this up as it is "their house and they can do as they please" which I understand in some respects but I'm doing this for my daughters health not to be difficult. We had crossed words and she has basically now told me because I can not pay market rate rent (and can't get housing benefit due to them being relatives) then she wants me out by the end of September so she can take in a student lodger and get more rental income. I am glad in a way as currently I'm sharing a tiny room with my son and little girl who's health is only being made worse from living here but I have no other option.

Currently I'm on income support. I get dla for my daughter and have put in a careers allowance claim. I would love to go back to work, but my daughters condition needs to improve before I can consider this. I am so upset because I never planned for this to happen and would never have got myself in to this situation if I knew I couldn't depend on my ex who has completely abandoned me and his children and has confessed he has no feelings for not only me, but his children too. My head is everywhere, I am so stressed that I am throwing up daily.

I have tried looking for private rental, I can't get a gurantor so I've been declined by several agencies. I don't want to end up in a bed and breakfast come September whilst my daughter is so poorly sad she is also due heart surgery in October. I don't know what to do. Will the council listen to me? Or will they not listen to me until I am actually homeless in September? Will they put me on the housing list/let me bid for properties now so I have somewhere by September or will they not do any of that until I am actually out of here??

Gobbolinothewitchscat Thu 28-Jul-16 21:46:02

Oh, this sounds hard. I'm sorry

I am no expert but have you called Shelter? They can give you some good, practical advice

The next thing is to visit your GP and get a detailed letter regarding your little girl's diagnosis and prognosis. I woukd get that ASAP.

I would then recommend taking a copy to the housing office at the council and sueaking to someone there to ensure that the information is clearly attached to any application you are making

LostMyBaubles Thu 28-Jul-16 21:48:44

Go up to the council housing office with your children and tell them your circumstances. They will definitely help you out

user1468957602 Thu 28-Jul-16 22:14:06

Thanks for your advise, no I haven't spoken to shelter but I will go on their website when I'm home.

I know the council have an obligation to help me, I'm just worried about when. I've spoken to a friend who say the council will not do anything at all until I am actually homeless as right now I'm not, I just have a deadline to be out by. But obviously whilst I have a 2 month warning, I would rather spend that 2 months trying to find somewhere so when the time comes I can move and settle opposed to being in temporary accommodation. I just really don't want to be stuck in a b&b whist my daughters on oxygen and recovering from heart surgery. So it's just a question of when will they help me. I've applied to get on the bidding system to bid for a property but I'm unsure if I will be treated as a priority now or when I'm actually homeless? Will my daughter mean I'm more of a priority?

TortoiseVTurtle Thu 28-Jul-16 22:15:58

Is it worth getting in touch with social services so that they can assist you? So sorry that you have this stress going on at such a worrying time anyway.

cestlavielife Thu 28-Jul-16 22:21:02

Ask your gp to refer you to the right social worker eg children with disabilities team or ask to speak to the social worker based at the hospital. Tell the paediatrician /consultant so they can write what would not be suitable accommodation

TheWeeBabySeamus1 Thu 28-Jul-16 22:27:10

If you can get your grandparents to write a letter stating that you can no longer live there as of X date then the local authority has a duty to house you before you become homeless - I was advised of this while on the council waiting list many years ago (before I had a child so in less need than you) by the housing officer who was processing my application. The rules may have changed in the last 8 years but no harm sending the letter anyway.

LizKeen Thu 28-Jul-16 22:32:43

I am not an expert, but from past experiences these are a few thoughts I had.

Get your grandparents to put the deadline for moving in writing. A letter written to you saying you have to leave.

Look up charities in your area. We once were in a bad situation and a homeless charity put up a bond so we could move in to private rental. They basically signed to say they would cover the deposit if it was required. It never was, but it covered the LL against the risk of taking us on. See if there is anything similar to that in your area.

There are a few people who can write letters in support of your "claim" to housing, a social worker, GP, perhaps a consultant that you are under at the hospital? They can outline the needs of your children and the impact being homeless would have on them etc.

Contact SS. They will support you and help you. They may be able to direct you towards things that could help/services in your area you may not be aware of.

LizKeen Thu 28-Jul-16 22:33:42

Xposts. grin

thisismyfirsttime Thu 28-Jul-16 22:51:41

Your dd is under a clinic/ paediatrician I assume? Go to them now, asap. Tell them your circumstances. Go to your GP, go to (or ask for a referral to) your local disabled children's SS. Go to your local housing team. Tell them all your situation and kick up a massive stink about it. Hopefully you will be under a 'good' LA and network for your child but if not, be the one who calls every day, emails, writes letters. It's time consuming for sure but ime it is the parents who push, push, push who get there far quicker than those who are more laid back.

HarlettOScara Thu 28-Jul-16 22:54:22

You are technically homeless right now though. You became homeless when you split with your partner and staying with family as a crisis measure where conditions are overcrowded. Get yourself to your local housing department tomorrow and have a homelessness assessment completed. Not saying you'll be housed right away as I have no idea about the situation in your area but with 2 dependents and one of those with complex needs, you'll be a priority case. They have a duty to find you temporary accommodation if you want it but you don't have to take it. They're unlikely to try to put you in a hostel or B&B due to your daughters needs anyway as few, if any, would be suitable. You can remain with your GPs as crisis accommodation and still be assessed as homeless.

I work in social housing, by the way.

datingbarb Thu 28-Jul-16 23:07:31

You need to go see your doctor and health visitor immediately and get it in writing from them that you can not stay in your grand parents house for a second longer, your points should be immediacy bumped up on social points and you will be house quickly

Please don't wait until the end of September get into it first thing tomorrow, also your HV should be able to help you if you have nothing (I.e cooker, beds for the children etc) and point you in the right direction of some charities that can help

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