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Do we need a will?

(14 Posts)
Warl Mon 25-Jul-16 08:56:59

DP & I are 29 & 31 respectively and have been together 10 years, we have a 3 year old DD, everything is jointly owned & life insurance/mortgage insurance payable to the other in case either of us were to die. We haven't married (I'm previously divorced) as we didn't feel we needed that to show the extra commitment. However DP has quite a dangerously job, he recently started with a new employer & when reading through the forms we discovered that were the worst to happen I wouldn't receive his death in service benefit & he's now joined a work place pension which again I wouldn't be entitled to. So we've decided to bite the bullet & get married later this year.... We're going abroad no fuss, nothing fancy but getting the job done lol!! Anyway my question is... Once married will we still need to make a will or does the marriage make everything clean cut?

cozietoesie Mon 25-Jul-16 10:13:45


If your situation is simple then the wills might be simple but you ought to have them. (And with a very young DD, your situation is not so simple any more in any case. Eg have you agreed potential guardianship etc etc if, say, you were both to go tomorrow? )

They/It just help to make things a bit more simple at a time of fraught emotions. I've seen some difficult situations arise over eg money and possessions in the aftermath of a death and I'm sure it hasn't been plain sailing for other posters as well.

Badbadbunny Mon 25-Jul-16 10:21:22

Yes, you need a will to avoid arguments/disputes/confusion if either or both of you die. All the more important if you have a child and they survive whereas you and your OH don't. Custody battles between relatives aren't a pretty sight! You also need to protect your child if one of you dies and the other remarries - without a will, the new spouse could inherit everything and your child gets nothing!

aginghippy Mon 25-Jul-16 12:06:02

As pp said, having a will can make things simpler at a time of fraught emotions. Having a bereavement is difficult enough, you/DP might also be caring for a bereaved child. In that situation, I would want to make things as easy as possible for everyone.

You can write the wills now in anticipation of your marriage.

cozietoesie Mon 25-Jul-16 14:56:56

You might be interested in this thread and its initial guidance - especially if you don't have an existing/family solicitor.

Gfplux Tue 26-Jul-16 08:46:39

The pension scheme death in service normally has trustees and in the interim before your wedding your DP should write them a letter telling them he wants you to be considered his next of kin. This should also apply to the death payout.
This is often done as family's are complicated now and the trustees will except guidance on who to pay.

specialsubject Tue 26-Jul-16 15:59:36

yes, you need wills and you need them now. As someone mentioned, you write them 'in anticipation of marriage' as a marriage invalidates a will without this. (Get legal advice!!)

if it is a dangerous job and you don't get the protections from it, get yourselves down the registry office as soon as there's a space, never mind waiting for a trip abroad.

a pension normally allows for an expression of wish to someone who doesn't have to be a spouse at the time.

you also need to organise a guardian for the kid if (really hope not) you were both to die before she is independent.

Glitterspy Tue 26-Jul-16 16:00:53

Yes, it's my understanding your children get taken into care unless you make a will specifying who they should go to in the event of your death.

xenu1 Tue 26-Jul-16 16:44:26

Yes! (and I have not really considered your actual situation smile) Wills are a morbid but necessary thing. If owt does happen its great to have something written down and saves lawyers £££ and other issues - that is, its good to have an executor, too.
"Which?" do really cheap online wills, mine was £60 (with a 50% discount)

xenu1 Tue 26-Jul-16 16:50:04

Bit quick. My above point still stands but if you have a more complex situation a chat with a solicitor might be necessary, (more than £60 tho! smile) Good advice upthread:

Gill0102 Fri 29-Jul-16 10:16:20

Hi Warl,

Definitely seek some legal advice and get your will sorted out, it's something we all put off thinking there will always be time to do it..until there isn't.

On another note regarding the joint Mortgage Protection/life insurance. Be aware that any joint policy will usually only pay out on the first death, leaving the remaining partner without any cover for their own funeral expenses etc and if they want to then get cover down the line, they will be older & it will be much more expensive for them. If its solely a Mortgage protection policy this will usually only clear what the balance of the mortgage is at that time with nothing left over. A good idea to have joint Mortgage Protection which solely covers the mortgage and then 2 seperate smaller life cover polices should the worst happen. Or 2 seperate Term life policies which will cover the mortgage, but also leave enough for funeral costs and a lump sum to give the kids a start.

Warl Mon 01-Aug-16 13:34:45

Hi everyone, thanks to all of you who took the time to reply. Trip to the solicitors this morning, our bank account is £70 lighter but worth it for the peace of mind smile

Gfplux Mon 01-Aug-16 14:20:35

Hello warl
I still think you need to advise the trustees of your DP 's works.
This link might explain a little more about making your DP's wishes known to the strustees.

Frankly anyone with a death in service benefit should read this link.

cozietoesie Mon 01-Aug-16 14:25:24

Well done for getting round to it, Warl. And remember that this doesn't need to be your final disposition. There's nothing to stop you amending it at a later date - although it's not really something that should become a Saturday afternoon hobby. wink

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