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Feel Like I'm Up the Creek Without a Paddle

(6 Posts)
IsItNearlyBedtime Wed 22-Jun-16 13:41:18

I'm currently going through a long and drawn out break up. The OH or shall we now say ex and I are still living together in the home we have a joint mortgage for with our two children.
He works full-time and I work part-time, although I've only just started work again after leaving my job to bring the children up.
So the ex conveniently has said that he's had enough and wants us to go our separate ways.
I'm emotionally drained and have given up the hope that our relationship can ever succeed.
He's being very blunt about it all and wants to sell the house. I'm against this because it's going to cost about the same amount of money for me to rent somewhere and yet it's going to be a massive upheaval for the children and cost a lot of money simply to move - money which I don't have.
It's quite easy for him to up sticks and leave. He could just take his belongings in a backpack really as most of the furniture is mine.
The children will be living with me and so his biggest hardship is finding a house he likes.
The house has been valuated and has been in negative equity for some time, so if we sell it, we're not going to be eft with any cash.
We'll have the fees to pay and then the moving costs and then I'll need to find a house that is unfurnished as a lot of my furniture is quite new and I paid a lot for it (annoyingly he encouraged me to buy it) and it's going to cost a fortune and then pay a deposit and month's rent and I simply have no money.
We receive Child Tax Credit and Child Benefit and I work part-time. I'm all in a bit of a daze and was just wondering how other single mums cope?
Do you get more Child Tax Credit if you are on your own? I've never claimed any other benefits and worked full-time before I had the children.
My kids are now five and six years old. Whichever way I look at it, I don't have enough money and I don't know what to do.
l will book an appointment with the Citizens Advice but at the moment it's been very tricky because of work and childcare. The first time you go you have to get there really early to get in and even then you end up sitting all morning to speak to an advisor and that's if you are lucky. Then an appointment is made, but again, I'm working quite a lot at the moment so it's hard to attend an appointment, thus why I thought I'd see if anyone had any kind of advice to try and stop my head from spinning or where else I could access help which may be easier.
Thanks in advance x

JoJoSM2 Wed 22-Jun-16 13:58:18

Sorry to hear about your situation. Hopefully, at some point you'll get professional advice and once it is slightly less emotional your husband might see some sense re not selling a house which is in negative equity. Good luck at Citizens Advice x

IsItNearlyBedtime Wed 22-Jun-16 16:38:19

Thank you x Need a lotto win x

Rockchick1984 Wed 22-Jun-16 17:26:11

Sorry to hear about your separation.

Are you married? Is the mortgage in both names?

What is your annual income going to be in your part time job, and how old are your children?

Babyroobs Wed 22-Jun-16 23:11:18

You will get more tax credits as a lone parent, maybe working tax credits, help towards childcare costs ( as long as you work 16+ hours a week), child benefit and maintainence payments from your ex. Once you have found out what amount you will have each month you will need to work out if you can afford to keep up with the mortgage payments. You may find you are better off renting as you would then also get housing benefit towards your rent.

Lagirafe Thu 23-Jun-16 13:34:36

OP have a look at the "Entitled to" website - put in your single figures and see what it says.

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