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How will I manage as a single parent?

(11 Posts)
Purplelolly2000 Wed 22-Oct-14 21:06:00

Ever since my baby was born 6 months ago, my partner and I have been having a really hard time. I am desperate for us to stay together, but if the worst did come to the worst I don't know how I would manage on my own.
I have a good job (Teacher) but I have worked out that once I have paid for childcare my take-home will be about £10 a day! This is depressing enough on its own without the added relationship problems.

I own my home as I bought it before I met my partner (who is covering most of the bills while I'm on maternity leave) so am solely responsible for the mortgage but obviously should we split up, an income of £50 a week cannot hope to even make a dent in my outgoings. I have started doing some afterschool tutoring which brings in a bit of pocket money but not nearly enough.

I really really hope it doesn't come to it, but I am the kind of person who needs to have contingency plans for my own piece of mind, and I think I'm getting even more stressed out because I can't make any kind of backup plans. How do people manage on their own? I have no family that can help with childcare so that isn't an option and the nursery/childminder fees are crippling. I worked so hard to buy my house, I'd be devastated to lose it.

If anyone has any advice I'd be really grateful.

Vinividivino Wed 22-Oct-14 21:26:50

Have you factored in financial support that your partner would pay to your child? Would you partner be reasonable about this, do you think? Can you remortgage to a cheaper rate or move to interest only for a few years until your DC moves to school? Also check out any benefits/tax credits you might be entitled to.

CogitoErgoSometimes Wed 22-Oct-14 21:51:05

I agree with the PP that, in the event of a split, your former partner would be expected to pay maintenance for your child and also share the parenting duties. As a lone parent there could possibly be some tax credits available to you, depending on your income. If you check the website and run the benefits checker you may find some answers there. Council tax is reduced for sole occupants. Mortgage companies can be flexible given the opportunity so, if you explain the problem, they may be able to reschedule your debt. When I found myself unexpectedly single I took in a lodger to help share bills.

Three are all kinds of things you can do

Babyroobs Wed 22-Oct-14 23:21:11

You would most likely get tax credit help towards chilcare costs, but it is dependent on income. Also child maintainence payments.

justjuanmorebeer Mon 27-Oct-14 10:04:22

How much do you earn a year? Are you full time?

Scampy52 Wed 29-Oct-14 07:36:28

Depending on how much you earn you could get tax credit. Child support from the father. If put in that situation consider a lodger. Lots of women are in that position now and struggling but it becomes easier once the child gets older. Just dont give up if your relationship sadly breaks down. Hopefully it won't.

Purplelolly2000 Fri 14-Nov-14 19:36:35

Thanks for all your replies. Things have gone from bad to worse so it's not looking good. In answer to your question, I'm on maternity leave right now and am due to go back in February. I wasn't planning on going back full time as by the time I have paid for childcare There isn't anything left over.
I have looked at switching to an interest only mortgage which will help a little but to be honest the whole thing is a mess. I can't believe I am in this situation.

seagull70 Sun 16-Nov-14 08:23:31

Would you be financially better off for the time being if you didn't go back to work? You'd be entitled to more benefits and have no childcare costs?

justjuanmorebeer Sun 16-Nov-14 22:16:57

If you can list your income and hours that you are hoping to cut down ro people will be able to advise you better. sorry to hear your situation. I became a single parent in June myself.

Purplelolly2000 Sun 16-Nov-14 23:09:59

I thought about not working for a while but as My home is mortgaged I wouldn't get any help in terms of housing benefit etc so I would only be able to claim income support or job seekers which wouldn't even come close.
I looked at selling then renting but my mortgage is substantially cheaper than renting would be so that's out.
Can't do a lodger either as I only have 2 beds and neither room is big enough to hold both me and my DS.
Basically my take-home pay works out at about £70 per day and nursery is £63 per day. I am going to visit the CAB this week for advice as I don't know where else to turn

Rockchick1984 Sun 16-Nov-14 23:13:02

You will qualify for tax credits to help pay up to 70% of childcare costs, plus reduced council tax. What is your annual salary? And are you looking to return part or full time?

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