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Questions about mother in laws inheritence

(17 Posts)
saddlemac Thu 16-May-13 18:50:13

I live in england. My partner has told ne today that his mother has put in her will that if he dies before her then her inheritence goes to our first daughter and our soon to be born daughter. He says she has also put in her will that if she dies first the money would go to him and then if he died it would go to our kids. Can this be right? Surely as his partner the money would be classed as our estate if he died fter her. Before I anyone starts to critisise me for asking this I am the type of mum that goes without to make sure my child has the best start in everything. Firstly I said to my partner that I would like some provision put in his mums will that our children only get the inheritence at an older age and for certain uses such as education,homes, businesses ect. My partner received n inheritence at 18 from his dad and wasted al of it which he always said he regrets and he never went to uni because he got that money. Secondly can she put in her will that if she dies then my partner the money then goes to my kids.Would none of it go to me so that I could control how my kids use it?

FrebbieMisaGREATshag Thu 16-May-13 18:53:05

Is he your partner or your husband?

Morgause Thu 16-May-13 18:54:50

My parents' will left everything to me after the last of them died and if I died first their total estate would have gone to our son to be held in trust until he was 18.

We have done exactly the same with our will.

Marriages break up and people want to be sure that thier estate goes to "blood". My DH wasn't in the least upset about it.

FrebbieMisaGREATshag Thu 16-May-13 18:56:54

And what Morgause. My estate is left to my children in trust. My parents' estate is willed that it is shared between me and my siblings equally and if I die it goes in trust to my children.No partner of mine ever would get his hands on it. It is very common to do this and I don't understand why you think you would get your hands on his mother's money at all?

specialsubject Thu 16-May-13 18:57:10

if you aren't married to him then you have no claim at all. no such thing as common law.

regardless of this, what she says in her will goes unless you challenge it afterwards. I agree that giving money to kids at 18 is not ideal, but that is her choice.

lisaro Thu 16-May-13 18:58:56

Why on earth would you feel entitled to it?confused

MooseBeTimeForSpring Thu 16-May-13 18:59:23

If you're just his partner you have limited rights as you are not regarded as his next of kin. If he were to inherit the money and then die, the money would go to his children.

Only in the event of you being married and him not making a will would you automatically inherit.

Crikeyblimey Thu 16-May-13 19:01:32

If he inherits then spends it all - there won't be any for your children.

I'm fairly sure, once he inherits, it is his to do with as he pleases and can't then be made to hand it on (so to speak). If this was the case, he wouldn't really inherit it as he would have no control over it. It would be better for her just to simply leave the lot in trust for your children if that's what she wants and miss your dh out of the equation.

My mum left all her money directly to her grandchildren. My siblings and I got the house. So my ds (10) has money from his grandma in trust that simply isn't my money.

FrebbieMisaGREATshag Thu 16-May-13 19:05:35

He can be left it in a secret or half secret trust and have to give it to the children once he inherits.

saddlemac Thu 16-May-13 19:52:09

Thanks for the answers. Just to clarify to some of the responses, I don't think I'm entitled to the money. All I wanted to do was try and find a way that my kids didn't get access to the money to a lot older than 18 if the worst happened. I'm a big believer in education and working hard and I don't just want a lot of money given to my kids when they are too young to use it wisely and it ending up being detremental to their lives. My partner, who is now very resposible with money, has said that he would see if he can put in his will certain conditions of the moneys use so they can't fritter it. However what I wanted to know is can this be done and should we be asking his mother to put this in her will? I don't want her money I simply feel wrongly or rightly that someone is making decisions for my kids life that I have no control over.

iheartdusty Thu 16-May-13 19:56:20

you could suggest that she writes that the money must be held in trust until DC are 21 or 25 or whatever; she would have to name the trustees but otherwise it's not difficult to do.

Morgause Thu 16-May-13 20:00:21

I'd say it's up to her what she does with her money. You risk a family row by trying to tell her what to do.

Your partner is likely to outlive her anyway and it's up to him what happens next - he can create a trust if he wants to.

Our will is just the same and, fond as I am of my dil, it's none of her business what we do with our money - as she would be the first to say, I think.

ValentineWiggins Thu 16-May-13 20:00:56

Unless she leaves the money in trust with your DP and DC's as beneficiaries, she has no say in what happens after she is gone. If she leaves the money to your DP, and the rest of her will says "and when he dies it goes to xyz", that part is irrelevant. Once it has gone to him it is his to do with as he wishes (spend, leave to you, whatever).

If her will says "it goes to DP and if he dies before me then it goes to DCs" then that's fine. But her will has no control over what the beneficiaries do with it once they have inherited. If she doesn't want it going to you then it has to be left in trust for your DP/DC's.

And no, you can't just write in your will "i leave this to DC to spend on education", because there is no-one to enforce it - it has to be in trust so that there is a trustee who can control what it is spent on.

saddlemac Thu 16-May-13 20:09:38

Thanks this helped clear thing up a bit for me.

saddlemac Thu 16-May-13 20:18:51

Just one last thing if she was to put in that the money was to be left in a trust until they were older than 18, who does she name as trustees? I would rather it was professional people unconected to me so that it can be seen that I am suggesting this for the benefit of my kids and not any gain myself. I know the chances are my partner will outlive his mother and then he can make arrangements for his will to suit our kids, but life doesn't always pan out nicely.

Mutley77 Mon 20-May-13 14:42:00

She can name anyone she likes as trustees - her solicitor or financial advisor may be appropriate but they would charge for this I assume.

She can also write a letter of wishes to outline what she intends the money in the trust to be used for - i.e. she can specify that the money is left in trust and can be spent only on DC's education with the remainder being given to the DCs when they are "of age" (21, 25 or whatever she decides).

However it is her money and you sound a bit like you are trying to tell her what to do with it - she might like the fact that her grandchildren would have money to do with as they please and have some choices and luxuries in life. While you may not agree this is the best use of money it is, unfortunately, not your choice.

Mendi Mon 20-May-13 22:57:44

She might have given her son what is called a 'life interest' in her estate and that it then goes to her grandchildren when her son dies. That's not uncommon and it is for her to do as she wishes with her estate.

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