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I am desperate to help my unstable, utterly broke elderly mother

(4 Posts)
justlookatthatbooty Sat 27-Nov-10 13:54:59

For the sake of only posting information relevant to the thread i've edited the full story. Link to the full story in the general health section is here:

Basic story is as follows....

I'm urgently trying to help my elderly mother's desperate financial situation and would appreciate any tips or experience on the financial front.

My brothers and I have been trying to get her out of her house for 20 years. She can have everything she could wish for and more if she would only sell. She has 'sold' or nearly 'sold' several times, pulling out due to sellers remorse. I doubt that she will ever move out of the house, or that we would have to take power of attorney in order to take control, which is an awful awful thought.

She is however certain that she will put the house on the market in Spring, but she's been saying that for years, gets everything ready, works like mad on every single perfect little alignment of pots and china (in 22 rooms) before she'll allow the viewings/valuations and then pulls out when it gets really interesting.

I want to help her to release some kind of credit on the house but she has absolutely no income. She also wants to release some credit (enough for a year of living there, to see through the sale and no more).

She is now telling me that it's not possible, no-one wants to lend. She makes up a lot of stuff, down to the detail so it's hard to tell what's happenned and what's a figment of her imagination.

Surely there is some kind of mortgage possibility available based on the value of the house for someone without income, especially when it's a tiny tiny percentage of the value? Perhaps her age is the problem, no-one wants to lend? She does already have a loan, which my father was encouraged to take out before he died, but which had no insurance attached so Mum inherited it. Poor financial management. She pays the interest on it every month but has no more money to do so.

If she gave the house to my brother (38, architect, self employed but with successful own start up practice) then maybe he could borrow the money for her? I doubt she would do this because she's so mentally stuck but who knows now that she is finally utterly skint. We all have a close (if painfully exhausted exhasperated relationship) and my brothers and I are resolute in helping her, I must say to great cost on my brother's marriages. I live abroad and see her rarely but we are very much in touch by phone although that is getting harder, now that she can hardly hear. She talks, I listen, then we have to hang up because she can't hear me.

I"m thinking, who, where, what can I contact for help, to get some money released for her on the value of her house. On the health level, I don't know, some kind of assessment was due a long long time ago, but is certainly not welcome by her. I really don't know what to do.

AnnoyingOrange Sat 27-Nov-10 14:02:36

you could look in to Equity Release schemes, but I think people tend to be wary of them

here's one example

AnnoyingOrange Sat 27-Nov-10 14:04:28

here's soem info from Age Concern ty-release/

justlookatthatbooty Sat 27-Nov-10 14:39:34

Hey Annoying...thanks so much for the link. Have already spoken to someone and have some phone numbers to call on Monday. Very positive.

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