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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have any legal concerns we suggest you consult a solicitor.

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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have any legal concerns we suggest you consult a solicitor.

Legal matters

Malicious Communication

43 replies

Baby2019x · 17/09/2020 18:52

Hi,
I've barely slept nor eaten in the last 2 weeks due to this.
To cut it short, I have a very controlling ex partner. I moved out as I saw he had done coke infront of our baby. He was seeing our daughter for about 2 hours a week, once or twice a week. We were still having sex, which he insisted was to be unprotected.
I found out he had been sleeping with someone that he had been talking to behind my back, whilst I was still living with him and pregnant with our baby. He also told this new girl that our baby wasn't his, just his brothers kid. So I obvs lost it, I stupidly put a post on Facebook. I messaged a few of his work friends just telling that what had happened and whatever he had said to slag them off. He is now being disciplined in work an I'm under caution for malicious communication as someone has threatened him, which I'm not100% sure who it is. I deleted the post and deleted Facebook about 2 days after I posted it.
He doesn't want anything to do with our daughter. He had me fired from work when I was pregnant as he kept locking me in the house, he turned his family away from me and stopped my family and friends from seeing me. I've lost everyone, I only have my mum, I have no friends or work due to him. His brother has threatened to petrol bomb my house, where my baby is.
I apologised and admitted to everything to the police.
I'm not really sure what it is I'm meant to do now, or what will happen now. I'm so scared I'm going to get my baby taken away from me.

OP posts:

Report

Gazelda · 17/09/2020 18:59

I don't think any of that could possibly be a reason for your baby to be taken away. I'm sure you've learned your lesson regarding the posts and messages.
But I think you should contact Women's Aid to get support about the threats etc.
You need to get this man out of your life. Please don't have sex with him again. He is controlling you.

ChaChaCha2012 · 17/09/2020 19:00

Do you mean you've accepted a caution for malicious communication, or have you been interviewed under caution as part of an investigation?

Bluntness100 · 17/09/2020 19:05

What did you say on the face book post op and what exactly did you message to his work colleagues and how many of them?

I don’t know what you’re asking but don’t understand why you think you’d have your baby taken away from you for this?

Bluntness100 · 17/09/2020 19:08

Do you mean also you were interviewed under caution. And you’ve admitted malicious communications? And you admitted it

Malicious communication is defined as

Malicious Communications is where someone sends a letter or any other form of communication that is indecent or grossly offensive, threatening, or contains information which is false or believed to be false

Did you do this?

Baby2019x · 17/09/2020 19:10

The post was just saying that he had been sleeping with the both of us, the reason I moved out of his wasn't because of any of the reasons he had said

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Baby2019x · 17/09/2020 19:12

It was because I caught him doing coke infront of our newborn. And how controlling he is & that he's a piece of poop. I only told work friends that I knew & the girls he had been inboxing. Just told them what he had done, as he was going into work slagging me off, and lying. So I told them the truth

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ChaChaCha2012 · 17/09/2020 19:20

I only told work friends that I knew & the girls he had been inboxing

That sounds like quite a few people.

Baby2019x · 17/09/2020 19:20

I was taken on for an interview under caution & I have to wait 28 days to for someone to make a decision.
I'm just wanting to know what could happen, like what the decision could be.

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Baby2019x · 17/09/2020 19:22

@ChaChaCha2012
Yeah it was a few people. I know it was stupid now. I was just angry that he denied our child being his & i was fed up of the lies he was telling people.

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Bluntness100 · 17/09/2020 19:23

It doesn’t really add up op. Malicious communication is what I defined about, offensive, threatening, or untrue.

You seem to be saying you only told people the truth and we’re not offensive or threatening, so what did you admit? Why were they interviewing you under caution? This would indicate they had evidence of you being grossly offensive or threatening and saying untrue things etc?

Baby2019x · 17/09/2020 19:28

They didn't show any evidence that I was threatening to him. The officer said it was a civil matter and a massive waste of time. I called him a few words, then I apologised to him & asked when he was seeing our baby, and he's blocked me on everything & hasn't seen her for over 2 months now. I've tried mediation, but they've not heard anything back from him.
Then I get a phone call from his brother saying he's going to petrol bomb my house & throw a bomb through my window, and the police are treating that as civil, when he has a criminal record

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Bluntness100 · 17/09/2020 19:32

Well if they said it was a waste of time and a civil matter then you already have the decision.

Baby2019x · 17/09/2020 19:35

Even though she's still passing it on for a decision to be made ?

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ChaChaCha2012 · 17/09/2020 19:35

Is the malicious communication to do with someone threatening him as a result of what you said? That would make sense. If it relates to your communications then they may choose to go down the harassment route, again depending on what was said and what your intent was.

If they do believe you have committed the offence, then they may offer you a caution. If they do not offer a caution, then it will go to the CPS to decide whether to prosecute or not.

You need to speak to a solicitor for advice tailored to your individual case.

Baby2019x · 17/09/2020 19:40

They think I've got someone to message him of i hVs messaged him from someone else's Facebook account.
They said I was interviewed under caution, and then the officer couldn't make a decision on what was to happen next, someone else will but I'd head back within 28 days.

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Baby2019x · 17/09/2020 19:42

I'm just wondering that if for some magical reason I do get charged, Will I go to prison ? Like what will happen to me

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Sweetsuprise · 17/09/2020 19:45

If I were you I would grow up & stop posting stuff online, creating drama & have a little self respect. No one can insist on unprotected sex, take responsibility for your body. One good thing to come out of this is he is now your ex. Keep it that way and communicate only I'm connection to your child.

DoIneed1 · 17/09/2020 19:47

Sweetsurprise, actually men can and do insist on unprotected sex, I think there's a word for it.

Baby2019x · 17/09/2020 19:48

@Sweetsuprise
Thank you, I'm not going to become annoyed by the way you are speaking to me. As I'm well aware what I did was childish. But you have no idea what my relationship was like with my ex partner. As for communication with him, I have previously said I have no communication with him as he refuses to reply.

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Sweetsuprise · 17/09/2020 19:49

She said she was still sleeping with him, she didn't say it was non consensual

Baby2019x · 17/09/2020 19:51

If he wanted to have sex he would have just had sex. He did it when I lived with him when I was asleep. I gave in to having sex with him so that he would leave and so that he weren't an arse to me and would see our baby. He took condoms off as he wanted me pregnant, but I would only know afterwards and he thought it was funny

OP posts:

Baby2019x · 17/09/2020 19:53

This isn't what I was asking, this is irrelevant @Sweetsuprise.
I just wanted to know what would happen next, I've admitted to what I've done.

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Sweetsuprise · 17/09/2020 19:54

You didnt mention that in your initial post to be fair..Anyway peace out & good luck

Bluntness100 · 17/09/2020 19:56

Ah, ok that’s a bit of a drip feed. In fact a very big drip feed. It’s not about the messages you sent.

They interviewed you under caution as they think you’re the one who threatened him? What was the threat? They think you set up a fake account and were threatening him?

I take it you didn’t admit this?

The reason this takes 28 days is they need to track the electronic trail, they need to track it back and see if it was you or not.

Was it you op? If it was they will find the electronic trail, it’s not hard. If it wasn’t then they will know this too.

What can happen? It’s either a fine or a custodial sentence. Likely a fine if a first offence, but they don’t take kindly to lying about it. If it’s not you then honestly you don’t need to worry. They will know that. When you get the decision it will be they have either tracked it to you and are charging, or know it’s not you, and are dropping it.

Bluntness100 · 17/09/2020 19:59

Sorry I should add, if it’s someone else that person will also be interviewed to see if you’re behind it. If you’re not linked to that person then they are in the chair for it. Not you. Don’t worry.

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