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Teenager accused of serious crime

(28 Posts)
changename20192019 Sun 08-Sep-19 22:51:05

Hi, I have namechanged for this for obvious reasons. But penis beaker, naice ham, new neighbours knocked hole in walls (x10 threads) etc.

My young teenager has just been accused of rape. We were visited by the police this evening. They will be interviewed tomorrow. Their dad is going as responsible adult

School advised me of an "inappropriate" incident several months ago. I was not happy with their handling of the situation and made a formal complaint to the school which was brushed aside. I think this is relating to that.

They actually want to work for the police of all things.

Can anyone advise what next steps will be? Thanks

OP’s posts: |
BitchPeas Sun 08-Sep-19 22:54:35

This must be very stressful for you. So you think it’s the school that’s called the police over the ‘incident’ a few months ago? Did the school mention rape to you at the time?

changename20192019 Sun 08-Sep-19 23:01:29

I think it is the family of the other student. The school have been very busy pretending everything is OK, if they just bury it. The school referred to inappropriate touching, being unwanted kissing. Given that there was a 2 academic year difference and same sex - I was in agreement with the school that it was inappropriate. But the school felt that a "talking to" was sufficient and I didnt agree with that, hence the complaint.

OP’s posts: |
BitchPeas Sun 08-Sep-19 23:09:25

Ok I see, so the other student is male too?What is your DS saying to you? It’s really hard to predict what will happen with something like this. Is he willing to talk to the police honestly?

TreaterAnita Sun 08-Sep-19 23:16:18

I’m a bit confused, did you think your child should have been punished (I’m assuming he’s the older one) and that’s why the family have reported to the police?

In any event, subject to specialist advice (I’m a lawyer but not a criminal one) I wouldn’t have my child being interviewed by the police without a solicitor present.

JaniceBattersby Sun 08-Sep-19 23:27:48

There is absolutely no way you should allow your child to say anything at all without a solicitor. There should be a duty solicitor available tomorrow but you must, must have legal representation.

It’s difficult to give you more advice without any more information tbh but I will say that it’s very difficult for the police to secure a charge for rape, never mind a conviction.

Whatever happens, I hope that you are OK OP.

WorkingItOutAsIGo Sun 08-Sep-19 23:33:12

I cannot stress enough that you should watch the video on you tube often referenced here called something like - why you should never say anything to the police.

Legal representation and no comment all the way.

SleepyKat Sun 08-Sep-19 23:33:34

I think you need to pay for a solicitor if you can. Certainly if not your own one then a duty solicitor.

SleepyKat Sun 08-Sep-19 23:34:52

And I would agree that “no comment” interview until you’ve had time to get your own solicitor and had time to have a decent conversation with them is probably worth considering.

MyKingdomForBrie Sun 08-Sep-19 23:37:56

I'm confused. Your ds or dd was accused of inappropriate kissing or was inappropriately kissed? And now they have been accused of rape - by the same individual?

ChangeOfTides Sun 08-Sep-19 23:43:36

Definitely get legal advice and have a solicitor present. If your child wants to talk honestly with the police (dependent on solicitor advice) then you need to be certain they will be prepared to do that in front of your husband. They may be more comfortable being honest in front of another appropriate adult.

WorkingItOutAsIGo Mon 09-Sep-19 00:14:16

Seriously, do not let your child ‘talk honestly’ to the police. There is no upside to doing this and masses of potential downside.

Unshriven Mon 09-Sep-19 00:18:29

Is your son admitting that he raped the other boy?

Presumably the other boy is under 18?

StudentHelp Mon 09-Sep-19 00:21:57

Need more info, Op.
But hope you’re okay

MrsTerryPratchett Mon 09-Sep-19 00:22:56

Is your child the older child and if so, presumably that makes the younger child very young (because yours is a 'young teenager').

OctoberLovers Mon 09-Sep-19 00:24:03

Why do you say "They"

If its rape. It must be a boy

changename20192019 Mon 09-Sep-19 00:25:07

Thank you all for your comments. Much similarity. There will be a duty solicitor present tomorrow. But apparently only about 30 mins prior to interview. Only 1 parent could attend - so DC dad is going. My DC was accused of inappropriately kissing the younger pupil in the earlier incident. The school's response under their safeguarding policy was a step 1 "talking to" . I wanted Level 2 intervention, being support from either internal or external to the school. I have surmised from bits of conversation tonight that this latest accusation may be related.

My DC has SEN so getting them to be honest about things can be a push. I push because I know I have to to get the truth. Others may stop too soon or not know what pressure to apply.

None of this is helped that dad and I dont really speak, at all.

Thank you for the video name- I will try to watch.

Thank you for asking how I am. Shocked. And so angry - I have been asking for help for DC for a long time - school have done jack shit and dad has blocked request whenever he could. And here we are - not quite what I predicted but close. Dreadful consequences for my DC who has been very badly let down. But also for the other child, whatever happened. I am gutted.

OP’s posts: |
changename20192019 Mon 09-Sep-19 00:34:08

Sorry seen later posts. My Child has not admitted to rape at all or any sexual inappropriate behaviour. Any incident took place whilst boarding so not at home with family. Families are given little to no information by the school. I am trying to find out what the process will be, and how to best protect a vulnerable young person.

OP’s posts: |
Banangana Mon 09-Sep-19 00:38:14

Does the other child have SEN too?

changename20192019 Mon 09-Sep-19 00:41:01

Yes It is likely that the other child will have SEN too.

OP’s posts: |
kateandme Mon 09-Sep-19 01:01:14

he was let down?did you suspect he was going to rape someone?

changename20192019 Mon 09-Sep-19 06:48:23

No, but the school have tried the "talking part" ie level 1 intervention before over other incidents eg pushing on playground etc and it clearly hasnt worked. I felt the inappropriate kissing was the same behaviour but more extreme. So I complained. Level 1 is weak and ineffective. Level 2 would have been a step better support.

But I am not here to be questioned by strangers on the internet whether I thought my young teenager was going to rape someone. I came on here to ask for support about the police process as none of my family have ever had to go through it.

OP’s posts: |
ASeriesOfUnfortunateEvents Mon 09-Sep-19 21:08:21

OP, have you contacted any organisation that could perhaps guide you in this situation? It may be something worth looking at as they can give you the right support.

changename20192019 Mon 09-Sep-19 23:27:59

Thank you for all the advice. Duty Solicitor went for no comment interview. It seems as if the other child had been sexually inappropriate towards DC. So school not safeguarding any child properly at the moment. I dont know where to go with that. Regular inspections are carried out by appropriate regulators. DfE dont want to know about individual complaints. Very disturbing.

OP’s posts: |
AcrossthePond55 Mon 09-Sep-19 23:59:35

So your DC was the victim in this incident?

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