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Nonpayment of school fees

(11 Posts)
OhMy2017 Mon 29-May-17 06:49:36

Ex has never paid school fees. He can afford them. Should he then expect to be involved with what DC is doing at school and what is going on? Would a school refuse to give information based on the fact that one parent is refusing to pay?

What can be done about nonpayment? I am concerned that the legal system may not be of the view that DC should attend such a school. Do I just keep quiet and pay?

Lonecatwithkitten Mon 29-May-17 07:24:23

Was payment of fees covered in a court order?
School will try not get involved in who is responsible for paying.
My ExH does not contribute to fees, but it is listed in the consent order as being my responsibility. He doesn't meet some of his other financial obligations, but I would never exclude him from DD's life on this basis.

meditrina Mon 29-May-17 07:31:27

A school will give information to anyone who has PR who requests it. Any school, irrespective of fees and who is paying them.

Who is liable for the fees depends on who has signed the contract. Usually it is both parents jointly, so if he's not paying you pretty much have to (or you both get pursued legally for the fees).

Does he insist they must be at this school? As he's not paying it suggests he really isn't bothered. So yes, you could go to court for a specific order compelling his to pay, but if he is going to argue that he doesn't not think a fee paying school is the only suitable environment for them, and that he has no history of actually paying the fees since he made those views known, and that you are capable of covering the fees, then it is far from certain you would secure an order.

JanetBrown2015 Mon 29-May-17 10:12:08

The legal system will not result in your child being pulled out of school unless the father litigates the issue and wins (very very very unlikely). There have been a few cases eg a jewish and muslim couple arguing about things. One recent case had a parent who escaped very ultra orthodox judaism and she was now in a lesbian relationship. The children were ultra orthodox and I believe the English judge decided education in a jewish school was better for them as that is all they knew and what the father wanted but these are very very rare cases.

In my case our court order says I pay school and university fees (I earn the most). My children's father since the divorceh as not been too interested in schools nor visited them once in 10 years. I gave the school his address at the start and sometimes they have sent copies of reports to him which is fine with me. He did return everything from school unopened to me for about 8 years which was very silly but his choice. So I have not had any problems at all - it is just I have had to go to all parents' evening etc concerts without the other parent which is fine.

The private school will have a contract just with you. They might ask for emergency contact numbers for school trips and I have just given mine and their adult older siblings not their father's. I have never had a problem with him going to school; he has just not chosen to.
Some divorced parents at private schools arrange separate appointments with teachers if they get on so badly they cannot be in the same room but usually they sit next to each other and hear what the school says - my sons have a divorced parents of a friend and I saw them a few months ago together at the evening thing seeing the teachers whereas I have always gone on my own.

In law we are talking here about a private not a state school. YOu have contracted with the school not the father. The schools in the private sector have very detailed contracts. Probably best to read them and see what it says about this issue of the other parent where only one pays fees.

meditrina Tue 30-May-17 09:25:43

"YOu have contracted with the school not the father."

You need to check if that's the case. Were you still together when the DC joined the school? Did you both sign the enrolment forms?

JanetBrown2015 Tue 30-May-17 10:55:27

I think she has. Only I have a contract with my sons' school. I registered them and I pay the fees. Same with my sister (although her children were conceived by donor so not the same situation. But my point is loads of women pay school fees and are the only person contracted to the fee paying school.

However you are right she should check.

Bluntness100 Tue 30-May-17 10:58:03

I don't really understand. Was there a legal agreement he would pay the fees? Was this over and above child maintenance and he has not met his obligations ?

JanetBrown2015 Tue 30-May-17 11:07:48

I think it's more about interference and if the father has the right to attend school events and be sent school reports etc in a private school where the mother pays the fees and has been the only one to show any interest or register the children. Also some private schools ask both parents even if divorecd to sign the application form although of course they cannot do that in many cases eg children with a dead father, sperm donor children, fathers (or mothers) who have disappeared abroad, children whose mother is not sure which man is the father etc.

GreenGoblin0 Tue 30-May-17 12:45:43

if the father has parental responsibility then the school cannot refuse to give him information about the child's education regardless of who is paying the fees.

OhMy2017 Wed 31-May-17 13:12:49

Thank you.

kittensinmydinner1 Thu 01-Jun-17 09:10:59

This is completely bonkers !

So by OPs reckoning only the parent that pays the fees is allowed to have input /receive updates/reports. ? On the basis that 85% of men earn more than their partner/spouse in the socio-economic groups AB1. (the group most likely to pay for private school AND have an 'economic unproductive female spouse' - Sahm to you and me) Then it's fair to say by a conservative guess, At least fifty % of women DO not pay their private school fees for their DCs as these are paid by DH/Grandparents.

So those not paying shouldn't be able to discuss their dcs schooling.
Children are NOT pay per view. Be it school fees or maintenance.

It's NOT the parents right to see the child but the child's right to be involved with the father. Having ones father come to school events is part of that right.

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