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Chance of the father getting custody

(5 Posts)
lemon20 Fri 26-May-17 12:55:32

Hey, was curious about what's the chances of the dad having full custody of a child.

We split a few months back and there's times we get along but there's other times we're jumping down each other's throats and I hate it!
Even when we was together he'd make points such as if we broke up he'd take he wants her to live with him. I thought we'd be together for the rest of our lives so I let it past.
We had personal issue that we just seemed to not be able to solve we put our all into our new baby but not into our selves that we just could get back from unfortunately. He keeps threatening me with that same old I'm taking baby full time.

He's done nothing but point the finger and blame me constantly for everything always my fault at the beginning after I had baby I panicked at everything bathing breastfeeding he was supportive in a way but now says I was useless that he did everything I'm the worst mum ever and make me feel so horrible that I believed him and I broke down thinking I am the worst mum I lost my temper with him a few times and screamed at him because he just put me down when I was already down! I brushed it off like a strong women does and move along still now it's my fault we broke up he did a lot at the beginning after birth for me after I had baby and the housework. I did get up at the night feeds too. I got ill at one point where I just kept falling asleep even standing I went to the doctors and was prescribed with 7 different medication because I had low iron and vitamins in my body and one part of my live was failing but he uses that against me too.
i now live on fear everyday that someone or something will turn up at my door saying that my baby has to go with the father I'm petrified he's scarred me for life. (I was taken away from my mother at 13 due to home problems) but I'm nothing like my mother I don't drink I don't smoke I certainly don't do drugs never have and never will! I've never been in trouble with the police I do not have mental health I have a good track record through my foster parents and my files are amazing too I'm never done bad just lost my temper with him. But he's the opposite he has schizophrenia he's depressed all the time he's unpredictable he's known for heavily drinking and drugs and in trouble with the police (he doesn't anymore when we met and I told him if he ever went back to any of that I'll leave him and he won't see baby again) well he didn't until halfway I was pregnant he said it was a moment of weakness but I wasn't happy and let it sub side. He never did it again until just about 3-4 weeks ago it all happened that he was admitted to hospital because of the heavy drink and drugs. But he still claims that he can get our baby by me losing my temper at him.

I'm short tempered but I'm not stupid I wouldn't let anything hurt my baby I've never stopped letting him see her either! I've done what's best for Baby and he thinks baby being with his family and him will be her best interest.

I went to every appointment and still do now.

Yea I lacked as a mum at one point because I lost all confidence and I became ill doesn't make me a bad mum and won't certainly make me lose her either?

I'm so stressed and my anxiety had hit the roof because of it all

So would there be a chance he would get full custody?

Thanks in advanced x

Blisss Fri 26-May-17 13:04:35

It sounds like you have the upper hand. The courts won't give him custody if she drinking and droning drugs. They will look into all of that.

Don't worry too much, keep a diary and build a case up. I think you should get some legal advice aswell because it will reassure you and let you know where you stand.

I take it this was your first baby. All new mums panic, we all of a sudden have this tiny human that depends on us, it's normal and nothing to be used against you.

You sound like a good mum, don't change

Blisss Fri 26-May-17 13:05:19

Excuse my bad typing by the way, blame the hot weather lol

titchy Fri 26-May-17 15:06:49

Right so he's a schizophrenic alcoholic drug abuser with issues so serious he's been hospitalised recently.

And you're none of the above.

Just think logically about the above - who would an impartial experienced judge pick to be the sole career of a baby?

lemon20 Fri 26-May-17 15:35:38

Thanks for the reply that's what I keep telling myself but he's just so good at convincing anyone he could sell a 2p coin for a lot of money! He's overly confident and cocky! And he's sorting himself out again and getting better this is was I'm scared off that he can be so convincing and I just needed some reassurance that because I have no track record of anything and he does I have a higher chance of keeping her. I know it sounds all silly but I have just been beaten down emotionally that I just lost confidence in myself x

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